O----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------O

• general information.

Name: Merek Grimmaldus
Gender: Male
Age: 1,052
Family and Relations: None.
Voice Claim/Accent: American
Role in a party: DPS Tank
Level: 2 (4/10)
Stats:
Strength:4
Dexterity:5
Constitution:2
Intelligence:5(+1 from racial)
Wisdom:1
Charisma:3
Spirit:0

• Personality Info

Species: Artificial Human Bound Monster
Personality: Kind and bigger than life.
Likes: Forges, LMGs, and other high power firearms
Dislikes: Pancor Jackhammer, Goblins, and Eldritch monsters.

• Physical Description

Height: 7’9
Weight: 426
Hair: black
Eyes: blue
Markings/Scars/Tattoos: Scratch marks on his cheeks.
Extra: Has three platinum studs in his skull above his eyebrow.
Appearance:

• Equipment [Pictures also suffice]:

Clothing: While out of his armor he wears Jeans, combat boots, a Evil Dead shirt, and a holster for his Talon of Flames.
Armor and armor attachments:

• Assault Pack: A even stronger version of the jump pack, boasting two massive thrusters as well as a energy field projecter designed to allow for the power armor wearing user to crash down like god himself among enemies.

Only usable while wearing power armor, allows for the wearer to fly up to sixty feet per turn, applies a +3 to dodges, and upon landing from a height greater than thirty feet apply a strength save of 10+ distance in feet above thirty in groups of five + wielder’s strength. On a failed save any enemies that are within ten feet of the landing point are knocked prone and the wearer can make attacks of opportunity against them, on a crit fail the enemies are stunned for 1d3 rounds.
Armor set: Emperor’s Angel.
Helmet: Prateor’s Visage (Legendary) - ”Crush them…slaughter them.”

• Armor Mods - Heads-Up Display (Unlocked): A tactical visor which displays necessary biometric and target-acquisition data. Provides a +2 bonus to Perception rolls
  
• Armor Mods - Treasure Finder (Unlocked): A specialized radar which allows for the detection of hidden treasure in a 15ft radius around the user. Cannot detect treasure hidden by supernatural means.
  
• Armor Mods - Terrain Anomaly Detection System, T.A.D.S. (Unlocks at PC Lvl 3): An A.I. image processing unit constantly scans the terrain within view of the user, highlighting any anomalies such as footprints, claw marks, etc. for easy detection.
  

Gauntlets: Hochmael’s Will (Legendary) - ”You need only to send me to face our enemy. My hands alone will be enough to break their bones and their souls.” — Hochmael

• Armor Mods - Striker (Unlocked): A sufficiently light alloy ensures fluid movement while covered in armor. +2 to dodge rolls and to unarmed strike attacks such as punches.
  
• Armor Mods - Punches of Power (Unlocked): Every punch made has a chance of dropping an orb of power. Roll a d10, if it lands on 1, an Orb of Power is made. When an Orb of Power is generated it is automatically collected by its producer. When collected an Orb of Power reduces the cooldown of the producer’s Super Ability by 1 round. (Gives Grimmaldus 10 Phoenix flame)
  
• Armor Mods - Tempered Rage (Unlocks at PC Lvl 3): Every successful 5 unarmed strikes performed grants a temporary buff to all further unarmed strikes for 2 rounds. Upon being buffed unarmed strikes deal 3% damage than they would normally.
  

Chest Armor: Hollowed Fortress (Legendary) - ”They thought it was impenetrable…they were wrong.”

• Armor Mods - Strong Alloy (Unlocked): A stronger metal alloy ensures the wearer of this armor’s safety even more so than before. Takes 20% less damage from Piercing and Slashing sources.
  
• Armor Mods - Anti-Magic Alloy (Unlocked): A safe Hive spell has been cast on this armor, making it slightly resistant to magic attacks. Takes 20% less damage from magic sources.
  
• Armor Mods - Dense Alloy (Unlocks at PC Lvl 3): The alloy of this armor has been increased in width, allowing for greater concussive force to be absorbed while mitigating damage as much as possible. Takes 20% less damage from Bludgeoning Sources.
  

Leg Armor: Strapped Slingers (Exotic) - ”An outlaw’s never looked this good.”

• Armor Perks - Locked n’ Loaded: Weapons which take multiple rounds to reload have that time cut in half. Weapons which take one round to reload are instantly reloaded when stowed away. Allows you to pull out weapons much faster and provides a +2 bonus to initiative rolls.
  
• Armor Mods - Spring-Loaded Soles (Unlocked): Newly added suspension system quite literally gives the user a spring in their step, providing a +2 bonus to movement rolls as well as allowing the user to jump an extra 5 feet.
  
• Armor Mods - All-Terrain Boots (Unlocks at PC Lvl 2): A heap of modifications have allowed the user to properly traverse almost any terrain. Toggleable magnetic plates allow the user to walk up walls and across ceilings without issue as well as stick to any solid surface with an attraction force of about 50 pounds. Magnetic plates do not slow movement speed.
  
• Armor Mods - Even Springier Soles (Unlocks at PC Lvl 3): Previous spring-loaded suspension system has been upgraded, giving a +3 to movement rolls instead of 2 and allowing the user to jump an extra 10 feet in the air.
  

Accessories:

• Servo Ghost: The source of his power, this tiny skull like companion is at the moment broken, keeping it from bringing him back from death beyond what it already has but it’s ability to grant him access to pure plasma and electromagnetic fields to contain them as well as protect him from the Phoenix Flame protocol.

Can hack and scan independently of Merek’s turn.

• Rosarius: A necklace/amulet that can be tied to a belt, the amulet contains technology that produces a transparent field of energy that turns tiny objects and energy moving at high speeds through it into light.

Applies advantage to block bullets and similarly fast ranged attacks. (Does not work against magic)
Weapons/Other:

• Talon of Flame: Merek Grimmaldus’s hammer is made from steel, the Talon of Flame’s haft and head are roughly a foot and a half in length and constantly ablaze. It can be thrown and if not retrieved immediately or relatively quickly it vanishes, slowly being reconstructed by his GS over a few minutes.

Uses Strength to be thrown, deals X1.5 damage when thrown, if it hits and is retrieved Merek is healed for 25% health.
Deals 1d12+STR blunt (or the same amount of piercing if used with the pointed end) and 1d4+INT burning on a hit.
If not retrieved before three rounds are up after being thrown this hammer vanishes and reappears attached to his belt after six rounds.

• P10K: A two handed SMG designed after a old world P90 but takes energy cells, the same shape, mag load area, and the silencer on it resulting in the weapon being perfect for Merek due to him being from modern day earth and used to the SMG. The main body of it is designed with a mag lock body, resulting in it sticking to armor when not needed and the tube at the end not only helps to hide the source of the shots by hiding the flash but also lowering the already quiet Energy weapon.

It has been improved via the pack a punch to a much cleaner version as well as having better cell magazines, holding a hundred rounds instead of fifty rounds.
Deals 5 burn damage but makes five attacks due to burst fire, this damage is boosted to 8 burn per shot against armored targets.
After firing thirty shots, the gun can release the heat generated by the plasma going out in a shotgun like blast of energy.
Deals 25 plasma (Unable to be healed in combat) + 1d20 plasma to a single target up to thirty feet away.
Silenced shots.

• Whirlwind Launcher: A armor module that attaches to any form of armor, as well as allowing for impulse control or manual controls. The unit typically remains folded into a small orb with a rectangle to the side but when unfolded forms four rocket launchers loaded with smart ammo.

Uses intelligence and dexterity.
Deals 2d20 blast damage.
Kraken missiles: ignores armor bonuses, deals quadruple damage to armored vehicles and double armor wearing enemies.
Antipersonal: hits all enemies within ten feet of the target, deals double damage to unarmored targets.
Flak shot: Flying enemies automatically are grounded when hit, advantage against airborne enemies.
Energy surge: On a hit apply a 15+intelligence DC, on a failed save all electronics within ten feet of the target are shut off.
Takes ten rounds to load a barrel. (Passive)
Can be fired as a bonus action or fired all at once with a attack action.
• ⁠Kusanagi-no-Tsurugi: ”A legendary blade who’s name literally translates to “Grass-Cutter”. This blade is said to be able to cut through almost anything and is practically indestructible. In earlier legends, this blade was associated with the clouds or winds and said to have been wielded by Amaterasu, the sun goddess of Japanese mythology. Because of this, it is able to emit a powerful gust of wind every 4 rounds which can knock opponents back a good distance.”
Deals 2d6+DEX slash damage that ignores nonenchanted armor and slash resistance. Can be used to parry and block energy weapons.

• Komodo shotgun: A belt fed shotgun designed for clearing out zombie infested ships, the heavy gun contains a means of blasting back groups of people to buy the wielder time to reload due to a gravity engine built into the gun under the barrel.

Deals 2d10 piercing.
Upon using the attack action with this gun attack the same target three times or attack three targets.
Deals double damage to zombies.
Has the ability to apply knockback to any enemies inside of ten feet to send them to thirty feet back. Cooldown of four rounds.
Capacity: sixty shells
Loading time: three actions.

• Smart Pistol MK6 ‘HeadHunters’ X2: A tech heavy pistol that relies on power armor to make the most of it’s ability, painting targets and overriding the wielder’s suit to guide their aim towards heads.

Capacity: 9 bullets.
Uses Perception and Intelligence.
Deals 1d6 piercing per shot. Deals triple damage on a crit, crit chance of 18.
Burst: Once per ten rounds tag 3+wielder’s level amount of targets or a single target that many times, firing that many times in a single action.
Burst can only be used by cyborgs, while wearing power armor, or wearing sci fi optical wear and a mechanical arm sleeve.

• abilities:

Weakness:
Magical Null: Merek is unable to be healed by spells or learn magic.
(-3 slots)
Racials:
Artificial Human Bound Monster: Merek’s nature as a HBM made his body stronger and his mind sharper than it had been in life, his body actually becoming unaging and a bit bigger than he was in life originally.
Plus one to strength and intelligence.
Unaging (appears 41)
Superhuman body: Falling damage from a fall up to 10 stories is nullified, all other is subjected to a 90% reduction.
Secret’s in the armor: Grimmaldus can only wear his Imperium Armor set and it replaces stats. The armor gains power as Grimmaldus levels up.
Passives:
Combat Mastery: Grimmaldus moves surprisingly fast when it comes to combat,
Actives:
Hammer of Dawn: Merek’s strongest SG given ability, during it he summons a massive burning hammer and swings it about, smashing bones and burning away his enemies with his Servo Ghost’s plasma. While the hammer itself is extremely powerful it has even more powerful abilities than simply swinging it about, using them results in draining the Phoenix flames that fuel his hammer.
For every attack of Merek’s that lands and enemy attack blocked gain half of the damage dealt in Phoenix Flames, upon reaching 100% Phoenix Flames the Hammer of Dawn can be summoned.
Weapon stats:
Has a plus 3 to attacks.
Deals (LVL)d8+STR in blunt and a additional (lvl)d4+INT in burn damage.
Requires both hands to swing, can be held with one hand. For every round held drain Phoenix Flames by 10%.
Eruption: Merek brings his hammer up and back down, leaping ten feet into the air to slam his hammer into the ground and discharge a blast of flames through the ground and into a single target.
This attack has advantage and adds intelligence modifiers to it.
Drains ten percent Phoenix Flames in addition to the round drained amount.
Dawnguard’s Wrath: Merek’s Phoenix flames wreath his arms and body, blessing his body with sheer strength and speed enough to unleash a flurry of three blows in the span where one should be done…
Grants the ability to attack three times per attack action while wielding Hammer of Dawn but consumes 10% Phoenix Flames per use.
(Ten slots)
Ignition Burst: Merek makes a ball of plasma in the palm of his left hand, contained by electro magnetic fields before being flung like a baseball at a target, upon sticking it burns into the target before exploding!
Deals (Lvl)D6+INT burn damage, this weapon is considered sticky, dealing (X1.5) more damage upon a successful stick. Explosion radius of 4 feet.
Uses Intelligence for casting.
Cooldown of 6 rounds hit or Miss.
(3 slots)

• backstory: Merek was a spec ops in life, helping to train American troops in Europe with a captured AS Val, showing them how it could not only pierce body armor but also served as a suppressed sniper rifle or a SMG. Eventually he was shifted over to training with the P90 and literally fell in love with it, the ambidextrous grip, top loading mag, and the over all length of it helped the fact that it was made to RIP armor into fragmentation made it all the better. However, before he could start training other soldiers with it, he was trampled to death when a mounted cop’s horse was spooked by a car back firing, his broken body resurrected via the Ghost Servo’s Phoenix protocols in order to have a outlet for it’s power.

O----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------O

Well, I guess I should start at the beginning the majority of all stories tend to start. I was born in Detroit, Michigan in the month of June 1977. I was soon adopted and never met my biological family but have been told that I have two biological sisters, Karen, and Xinea as well as two brothers named Robert, and Jerry(perhaps Gerry I suppose). My mother is Patricia Bray, and my alleged father is Carl Ambers according to the adoption records that I found after the death of my adopted mother, Opal in 2001; I was a grown man by then. I was adopted by Opal and Frank Smith(we will say) in 1978. Somehow they knew my biological mother but that connection was never revelled to me. Opal was one of 17 children who grew up on a mountain somewhere in West Virginia. I was told that her father killed himself in front of her and her siblings when she was less than 10 years old. He was a coal miner and was injured in some type of accident and left unable to work with 19 mouths to feed; hard to fathom but for the love of God why in front of the children? Regardless of his reason this event left a lasting impact upon his 9 year old daughter that would ripple throughout space and time with the force of an atomic bomb; to this day that act and subsequent reaction linger. Opal was a devout Pentecost, Southern Baptist, or whatever similar religion she felt; not exactly sure. She was once a member of the People's Temple church in the early days when they were in Indianapolis (circa 1953-54). She left the church when the new leader, a man by the name of Jim Jones took over and began to allow people of other races into the fellowship; Opal being a woman of God as well as a devout racist left the church. They would later commit forced suicide in Ghana by drinking cyanide laced drinks at the end of machine guns. Opal was a small woman and she had many older brothers. She spent her developmental years fatherless, emotionally wrecked, and on a mountain with those brothers; I do not wish to even imagine what that must have been like, but one thing is for certain; she grew up mean and she knew how to fight, how to hurt a person, and how to use her 4' 11" 120lbs to do damage. Her temper was short and she was fast to react in a violent physical nature. She was married to Frank who was from Kentucky. Frank ran a laundry delivery service, smoked cigars, and loved pro wrestling. He was already in his forties when I was adopted as was Opal. Frank was amazing to me as a young child but as time went on he became isolated and didn't much bother with anything other than work. Looking back it is obvious he was terribly unhappy but that is unfortunately the theme of this story. I also had three adopted sisters that we shall call Kay, Mary, and Carry. All of whom were already 10 and older once I was brought into the household. The six of us lived in a two bedroom single bath home on the south side of Indianapolis. My earliest memory is literally the day that they brought me to their house; you may think that is crazy, a child less than a year old having a vivid memory but I swear to you I do. I remember being brought into the kitchen and being placed into a high chair with a pack of saltines....then a bath and to bed. For the first few years it seemed that we had a happy, perfect family. Frank made good money and so Opal stayed home and managed the house while watching me. I remember how nice she was at first but that would soon change, everything changed. The early eighties were a rough time economically and it showed. The stress of life really brought out the mean in Opal, she would fly off the handle in a millisecond flat. I was a very advanced child for my age and by pre-school I could count to 1000, read children's books myself, and I knew all my shapes and colors beyond the standard "circle, square, blue, red". My adopted parents were not very well educated and I think they were taken aback by the rate at which I absorbed information. It could not possibly be that this child simply has a thirst for knowledge and an ability to process things; it must be DEMONS...yep, folks, demons. From the time I was maybe 3 until I stopped speaking to Opal circa 1999 I was repeatedly told that I was "FULL OF DEMONS" as well as the everpopular"YOU ARE GOING TO HELL FOR _________" Now you can add whatever you wish to that blank up there because she sure did. I was going to hell for running in the house, catching insects, not going to bed on time, throwing rocks, playing with sticks, you name it, and he'll was fucking terrifying. I was taken to churches where people preached that the devil was not among us , but inside of us all!!! and as I watched them shake and scream and yell it honestly scared the shit out of me. Being a developing child and being told you are possessed by creatures from hell may have a lasting mental effect. Like many kids I began to rebel against and since I was full of demons I began to act accordingly. Things in the household spiraled downward like a toy boat circling an open drain. Opal was becoming aloof and isolated, coming from her bedroom only to cuss, complain, and rage. After the first few times getting my ass or face slapped up I learned to shut my mouth but unfortunately my older adopted sister Mary never got that lesson. She was about early high school age when I was adopted but I do not remember either of my two oldest sisters going to school at all. She like rock music of the time, she didn't dress appropriately, she was loud, and she did not listen to anything she was told. She was a typical teen girl in the 80's until she snuck out one night and some men snuck PCP into her drink. She had a bad reaction and seized, they just dumped her from the car onto a cold, dark Indianapolis street corner in the middle of a ghetto where she lay until found. She was rushed to the hospital where she died and was revived many time; luckily she lived, but she had went without oxygen and it left her with some mental impairment. She never really progressed past a teen mentality. I do not know if it was shame at her sneaking out with men and being discovered or the lingering mental illness but Opal had a fire for her like no other. They once had a shouting match over what Mary was wearing and after a few minutes Opal picked up an old golf wedge club that I had found and began to beat her savagely. I counted at least 30 shots before I got the courage to jump in from of her; I was maybe 8 years old. The following years would show a pattern of such actions with all four of us occasionally getting it but Mary and myself got the brunt of things...there were hot off the stove spatulas to bare skin, broomsticks, rake handles, and even the cast iron skillet with hot oil still inside. My father, having been introduced to Opal's violent nature knew better than to intervene, choosing to withdraw all together of the situation. Left to free rein Opal never missed an opportunity to abuse physically, or verbally. I remember being perhaps 9-10 years old and being as my parernts were way older I dressed like I was from the 60's,. Opal had since went to work at a metal polishing factory and I was left to the daily care of three teenage, adopted sister with no clue about basic hygiene so I smelled terrible and the stress of my violent home life had put weight on me other kids fucked with me hardcore. I had had a terrible day at school; my pants had ripped and all the other kids were laughing and calling me fatass and such literally all day long. So I get home finally and I totally break down into hesterical crying fits to which my "mother" responds to be yelling "BOY!!....WHAT IS ALL THE NOISE ABOUT!!?!" and through tears and in broken English I struggled to explain the events of the day and how all the kids said I "stink and that my clothes were trash and that I was too fat!!" and her caring response was to look me dead in my eyes and yell to me "YOU ARE FAT AND I AM NOT BUYING YOU NEW CLOTHES UNTIL YOU LOSE SOME WEIGHT!!" This event would truly cast a demon of hatred and anger deep into my soul that I would struggle to shake for the next 20 or more years. The next day at school, on recess a group of slightly younger children began to gather around me and began the usual verbal and physical harassment. As they had a few days previous they were attempting to set me up for that trick where one person gets down in a dog-like pose behind you while you are distracted and once in place the other push you over and everyone has a grand old laugh at your expense while you struggle to get your fat ass off the ground and get your wind back but that day I was not playing that shit and so when the little fucker ducked down behind me I immediately swung around with my right foot and landed a vicious snap kick directly to his eye socket; the sound of it breaking echoed the playground followed by painful wailing. It felt good to hear, it felt good to see the fear in the eyes of his friend's eyes, to send a message that I was no longer their victim or anyone else's for that matter. I started skipping school, vandalizing, petty theft, shoplifting, and anything other than wholesome which got me arrested for stealing CD's and Transformers from K-Mart. L.L. Cool J.....funny the shit you value when you look in retrospect. The ride home from the juvenile center on East 21st street was a long one and I was petrified of the beating that awaited me as new and different ways and items to beat the fuck from me danced in my head like those fucking sugar-plums from that stupid Christmas Song. When we finally got back to our house in Fountain Square I was directed into the kitchen where a length of 2/4 about 2 foot long waited on the kitchen table. Opal from behind me yelled out "BOY!!" which was what I was always referenced as as if I had no fucking name and when I did a 180 she belted me across my face with a hard right fist, but unlike every other time she hit me I did not scream out, cry, or even flinch from the blow. This further infuriated her and so she struck my face again to the same result, and again, and again until I firmly grabbed her right wrist at which point she immediately hit me with a hard left and I subsequently grabbed her left wrist. I was about 175lbs if not more and my strength overpowered her ability to strike me and when she realized that she could not move and seen in my eyes that this was not going to happen she began to scream "LET GO OF ME!!" to which I replied "I am going to let you go and when I do you are not going to fucking touch me in any way!!"...I let go, and defeated she walked away. After that she offered no real support other than a place to sleep. I began to steal clothing from people's clotheslines and after wearing the same pair of shoes for so long that my feet are literally deformed, I took a pair of Nikes off of someone's porch. Over the next few years I would have many more legal troubles, assaults, thefts, arsons until the State of Indiana stepped in and made me a ward of the state. I was sentenced and sent to a place called Glen Mills Schools in Concordville, Pennsylvania. It was supposed to be a fresh start and a chance to better myself and I was able to get my HSE, learn computer aided drafting, and I got to compete in powerlifting as well. It was the first time in my life I had seen a dentist even; I was 15 years old and finally I felt hopeful and happy; that would soon change.
If you would like to hear more please leave a comment or like. I also appreciate any feedback about my writing as I am not a professional in any way but always looking to improve my craft. If you made it this far; you are greatly appreciated.

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Chat +447593882116 (Telegram/Whatsapp) to get Todd V - Verbal Game Academy.
Todd Valentine's Verbal Game Academy Course will teach you his top strategies for effective communication.
Todd V is known for the extreme high quality of his content. In Todd V - Verbal Game Academy you will learn how to:
Be the guy that speaks to her emotions
How to walk up with absolute confidence
Make conversation FUN and PLAYFUL
How to ignite her sex drive
GET HER on a deep emotional level
To get Todd V - Verbal Game Academy contact me on:
Reddit Direct Message to u/RequestCourseAccess
Email: silverlakestore/@/yandex.com (remove the brackets)
WhatsApp/Telegram: +447593882116 (Telegram: multistorecourses)

I have been trying for over two years to get help with ADHD-symptoms.
My life is miserable. Losing everything. Late to everything. Time blindness to the max. So bad that I didn’t put my son in preschool knowing we wouldn’t make it on time and I could use the extra year to get control of this.
Anyway, the first psychiatrist wrote me off because while he was asking about my family situation, and childhood, I shared with him about my divorce that I was going through, and it made me cry. So he decided not to move forward with ADHD diagnosis until I work on the trauma. He also told me that I “was too smart” in college and high school so I didn’t feel the need to “pay attention.” I want to PAY ATTENTION. I want to succeed! But I can’t. I’ve tried.
Fast forward a year later, healed from the divorce and have been in biweekly therapy to figure out all things life, I go into see the psychiatrist again, and bring up the ADHD symptoms, which to me, are the core of my issues. I can’t get work done. I can’t finish anything. This psychiatrist told me, in response to me telling him some real issues I’ve been having related to the ADHD said, “it takes 21 days to build a habit.”
Top tier medical advice sir. IVE TRIED TO BUILD HABITS. It doesn’t work because of my suspected ADHD!
I’m so tired. I’m exhausted from battling simple everyday trials like arriving on time, not forgetting or losing things, not having to keep four different calendars and still forget appointments. The list goes on.

Normal: English
Italics: Español
​
TLDR; Point Nemo is not only home to Cthulhu's city, but irl is also the spacecraft graveyard. The place where the various space centric agencies of the world dump their multi million dollar equipment into to prevent disasters in the mainland,
What if the QSMP is a simulation held inside of a controlled enviroment made in a repurposed spacecraft?
El Punto Nemo no es solo la localización del supuesto hogar de Cthulhu, pero también en la vida real es lo que se conoce como el cementerio de naves espaciales. El lugar donde agencias internacionales especializadas en viaje espacial dejan caer sus equipos valorados en los multi millones para prevenir desastres en tierra firme,
Que tal si el QSMP es una simulación mantenida adentro de un ambiente controlado en una nave espacial?
Note that the \"heaven\" where the eggs end up in shares a lot of similarities with the inside of man-made spaceships like the ISS/noten que el \"cielo\" a donde llegan los huevos comparte un monton de similitudes con el interior de naves espaciales humanas como la ESI.
https://youtu.be/6SFp8jG-fdY
Now I have some questions to ask the lot of you, I will not deny the possibility of a more supernatural explanation, but considering Luzu is sharing minds with what seems to be an artificial intelligence, coupled with the revelations given to us by SOFIA A N D the existence of a "glitch monster" in the world, it is safe to assume everything that they're going through is artificial in the technological way-
I ask of you, if the eggs truly have souls and they're truly dead WHY can their parents request to PHYSICALLY see them one last time? and why does Cucurucho physically REMOVE them from the world to do this? if this was truly heaven... it sure does look too much like a controlled enviroment, with moving walls that can reveal very SMALL spaces where the eggs are held. which are usually four walls with no exit except the one that leads to the atrium. to the center.
If upon death the eggs truly are DEAD, and are truly sent to heaven... why is the layout of "heaven", and the way "heaven" works so much like a livable satellite, or a controlled enviroment like the International Space Station? (which is both)
​
Ahora, tengo algunas preguntas que hacerles, no voy a negar la posibilidad de una explicacion mas sobrenatural, pero considerando que Luzu esta compartiendo mentes con una Inteligencia Artifical, junto con las revelaciones que nos dio SOFIA y la existencia de uno "monstruo glitch" en el mundo, es facil de asumir todo lo que estan viviendo es artificial en el sentido tecnologico.
Les pregunto, si los huevos en serio tienen almas y estan muertos en serio POR QUE es que los jugadores pueden pedir verlos FISICAMENTE una ves mas? Por que es que Cucurucho TIENE que removerlos de la isla FISICAMENTE para hacer esto? si esto fuera el cielo en serio... se mira bastante como un ambiente controlado, con paredes que se mueven que revelan espacios MUY PEQUEÑOS donde mantienen a los huevos. Usualmente 4 paredes sin salida excepto la que lleva al centro.
si al morir los huevos estan muertos EN SERIO, y enserio llegaron al cielo... por que es que el "cielo" y como funciona trabaja muy sospechosamente como un satelite que puede mantener personas, o un ambiente controlado como lo es la Estacion Espacial Internacional?
​
https://twitter.com/Quackity/status/1650636806499762177?s=20
(note that the fact that it is a completely controlled enviroment is a feature even showcased in Quackity's promotional videos on twitter. if we are to believe "heaven" is that white, clinical place then that means both Quackity's are IN HEAVEN in those videos. Yet they're not dead. Heaven isn't a different layer of reality, it is a PHYSICAL place in the world.
noten que el hecho que es un ambiente completamente controlado se puede ver hasta en los videos promocionales de Quackity en twitter. si hemos de creer que el "cielo" es ese lugar blanco, clinico y VACIO eso significaria que ambas versiones de Quackity ESTAN EN EL CIELO en esos videos. pero no estan muertos. El Cielo no es una diferente realidad, es un lugar FISICO EN EL MUNDO.)
​
And think about it. think about it very carefully. we are shown how the members of the island arrive- but their ways of arrival are straight up nonsensical. irl there is NO LAND in Point Nemo- even if we are to take the cruise and the plane as understandable methods of reaching the island there is NOWHERE TO LAND.
THE ISLAND DOESN'T ACTUALLY PHYSICALLY EXIST. MEANING THE CREATORS DIDN'T FALL THERE BY ACCIDENT- THEY WERE FUCKING KIDNAPPED AND BROUGHT TO POINT NEMO.
You may be thinking "But Arabella, what about the recording of the black box from Baghera?".
Bold fucking statement incoming, okay? I think we can all agree they're pretty much in a simulation, right? how deep it goes, and it's full true nature is something we don't know, but the fact that baghera doesn't FULLY remember why she got on that plane is VERY telling.
if you are a evil federation, that's baiting and kidnapping people for whatever purpose- you NEED a explanation on why that person dissapeared. an allibi.
You even need an allibi to sell the lie to the people you've kidnapped. we already stablished, reaching Point Nemo by plane is impossible as there is NO LAND. People, listen to me-
what if the information from the black box was planted? Cucurucho and the other QSMP admins are constantly patrolling the world, it was either planted for the moment the plane crash was staged or planted AFTER the plane crash.
I need you to once more, repeat after me, and hold it in your brain matter: The ways that the QSMP members have arrived to Isle Quesadilla make no sense because there is no actual land in Point Nemo, specially a land mass as BIG as Isle Quesadilla.
The Island is FAKE. THE. ISLAND. IS. FAKE. ALL of it. THEY COULDN'T HAVE REACHED LAND AS THERE IS NO ACTUAL LAND.
...unless, of course. it does exist. They ARE at Point Nemo, just NOT surface level. they are, in fact, above it.
of course I have no way to confirm they actually ARE aboard a giant satellite like the ISS, but considering all the hints that are being left it actually makes a LOT of sense, it being a satellite actually would make it so INDEED the players have a far harder road ahead of them when it comes to escaping- as unlike if it were underWATER like a giant underwater base, the fact that it is above the planet's surface makes it far more treacherous for them to make their escape. depending on how far above the surface they are, as anything above 100 km (62 miles; 54 nautical miles) above the surface WILL trigger re-entry burn.
On top of that, simulating the day and night cycle is haaaaard, and would require a lot of resources... that would be unnecessary if the Island is a giant enclosed terrarium on board of a satellite.
​
Y piénsenlo. piénsenlo con mucho cuidado. se nos muestra cómo llegan los miembros de la isla, pero sus formas de llegada son directamente absurdas. En la vida real NO HAY TIERRA en Punto Nemo, incluso si tomamos el crucero y el avión como métodos comprensibles para llegar a la isla, NO HAY DONDE ATERRIZAR.
LA ISLA EN REALIDAD NO EXISTE FÍSICAMENTE. ESO SIGNIFICA QUE LOS CREADORES NO CAYERON ALLÍ POR ACCIDENTE, FUERON SECUESTRADOS Y LLEVADOS A PUNTO NEMO.
Pero pueden estar pensando "Pero Arabella, ¿qué pasa con la grabación de la caja negra del vuelo de Baghera?". Una declaracion MUY atrevida, ok? Creo que todos podemos estar de acuerdo en que están en una simulación, ¿verdad? qué tan profunda es, y su verdadera naturaleza es algo que no sabemos, pero el hecho de que Baghera no recuerde COMPLETAMENTE por qué subió a ese avión es MUY revelador.
si eres una federación malvada, que está hostigando y secuestrando personas para cualquier propósito, NECESITAS una explicación de por qué esa persona desapareció. una coartada.
Incluso necesitas una coartada para vender la mentira a las personas que has secuestrado. Como ya establecimos, llegar a Punto Nemo en avión es imposible ya que NO HAY TIERRA. Gente, escúchenme-
¿Qué pasa si la información de la caja negra fue plantada? Cucurucho y los otros administradores de QSMP están constantemente patrullando el mundo, ya sea que lo plantaron para el momento en que se escenificó el accidente aéreo o lo plantaron DESPUÉS del accidente aéreo.
Necesito que una vez más, repitan conmigo y manténganlo en sus cerebros: las formas en que los miembros del QSMP han llegado a la Isla Quesadilla no tienen sentido porque no hay tierra real en Punto Nemo, especialmente una masa de tierra tan GRANDE como Isla Quesadilla.
La isla es FALSA. LA. ISLA. ES. FALSA. TODA. NO PODRÍAN HABER LLEGADO A TIERRA YA QUE NO HAY TIERRA REAL.
...a menos que, por supuesto, existe. ESTÁN en Point Nemo, pero NO al nivel de la superficie. están, de hecho, por encima de él.
por supuesto, no tengo forma de confirmar que realmente ESTÁN a bordo de un satélite gigante como la ESI, pero teniendo en cuenta todas las pistas que se están dejando, en realidad tiene MUCHO sentido, siendo un satélite en realidad lo haría así que DE VERDAD los jugadores tienen una les espera un camino mucho más difícil cuando se trata de escapar, ya que a diferencia de si estuviera bajo el AGUA como una base submarina gigante, el hecho de que está sobre la superficie del planeta hace que sea mucho más traicionero para ellos escapar. dependiendo de qué tan lejos de la superficie estén, ya que cualquier cosa por encima de los 100 km (62 millas; 54 millas náuticas) sobre la superficie PROVOCARÁ una quemadura de reingreso.
Además de eso, simular el ciclo diurno y nocturno es difícil y requeriría muchos recursos... eso sería innecesario si la isla es un terrario cerrado gigante abordo de un satelite.
https://preview.redd.it/m6sszgo3lf3b1.jpg?width=700&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9d3fc9c1a529cda60816e72d581976d2c600d291
Thank you for coming to my deranged ted-talk.
Gracias por venir a mi platica de loquita.

Hello there, people. It’s been a while since last blog. So, I was reading Extracurricular Activities and Burrows, but while doing that Arches full story came out and some people asked for my opinion. I read it along with a friend and… well, let’s see what happened.
DISCLAIMER
Spoilers, lots of them. The story is not that long, you can probably read it in one afternoon.
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BEFORE PLAYING
So, Arches is like a “sequel” to Echo the VN and The Smoke Room. But, you can actually read on its own, nothing from Echo is properly explored here, nothing new is added to the lore of Echo. It’s not even the end of the town neither.
But, it’s written by the same one who wrote three routes in Echo, Adastra, Khemia and Interea… so you can expect low quality here right from the start. I had pretty low expectations and yet I found myself disappointed. It’s magical.
I have a blogs talking about Echo, I should probably remake them, my very first blogs are not really that good explaining my points, but for now they work, kinda. As for The Smoke Room, I think is going fine for now, I recommend it, but probably won’t make a blog about it until it is done.
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THE ART
So, the art was made mainly for PaintFox, a pretty good artist, the characters look fine for the most part. However, I think it was a mistake to have him as the main artist, his style just doesn’t fit the kind of story the VN is trying to deliver. This can be also the fault of the direction he was given, the character, even tho they have body language, they look rather stiff, there is not a great use of body language and CGs were wasted for the most part, illustrating parts that didn’t need it.
But, as a typical Echo related game, we have the worst offender: Empty Screens. Man, there are too many times where the screen is just empty with an overly long narration, which would be always a sin on my book, this is a visual novel. It doesn’t help that the scene with the most action are the emptiest.
So, we have a combo of the wrong art style, misuse of it to even outright now having visuals, which only concludes on the art being bad. Which is a shame because the artists who worked here clearly put effort on it and they are good artists.
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https://twitter.com/i/status/1464318180831158275
MUSIC AND SOUNDS
The music is forgettable for the most part, boring and most of the time doesn’t really fit the scene. The sound effects are just like Echo, meaning they have little to no impact.
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THE PLOT
A stupid couple does what every stupid couple in a bad horror movie does, go to a dangerous ghost town with no service and proceed to take all the decisions that would kill them. The main different is that in a horror movie, the writers would have the balls to kill them. But, we are talking about the same writer as Adastra, of course the ONLY one who dies here is the boring, generic and plain villain.
So, Devon and Cameron go to visit Echo to do some ghost hunting. Devon thinks his boyfriend is a psychic so that’s why he brought him here despite his mate having a past of plenty of mental issues. Cameron has a long scene explaining his tragic past to his boyfriend, after 5 years of relationship, and Devon still took him to Echo… because in Echo character agency doesn’t exist. And, no, it’s not my interpretations, he narration heavily implies it’s the town’s influence.
So, once there, the couple go through some typical Echo shenanigans, including corrupting characters, vision, possession and such.
Plenty of interesting concept are presented on the table… and then are immediately dropped.
Later on, Artie is added to the story… he is just a walking plot device, another idiot that won’t be killed.
And then, we have the Brian sections, a good chunk of the story is spent with Echo’s most useless serial killer, whose entire number of victims were killed of screen. And the dies… again… for the third time in this saga… and people still think he is dead for good.
At the end, everyone but the villain survives, we have and dragged out epilogue which tries to convey there were consequences for this event, but since most of this time frame is skipped, it’s pretty shallow.
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WORLDBUILDING
Now, there are psychics in the Echoverse, they are more susceptible to paranormal activity and can develop the power to read minds. This is greatly wasted in this story.
There are multiple timeless and dimensions… already confirmed in Echo, so, no new info there. Yes, your fanfic is canon.
This VN is not a follow up to any of the routes in Echo VN. Brian died in Jenna’s and Leo’s route, Duke died in Flynn’s and Leo’s, the hysteria happened in 2017 in TJ’s route and here is took place in 2015, and the whole Echo paranormal stuff was solved in Carl’s route.
CHARACTERS
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CAMERON
The main protagonist of this story. He is so annoying with being so stubborn to stick in Echo so he can have more trips with the paranormal stuff, and he even willingly smoke weed to make it easier.
He has a sad backstory with his mother, he has plenty of mental issues and had drug issues. Yet, most of that is exposed through exposition dumbs by the narrator, we don’t really see the consequences of those behaviors during his entire life, but they treated more as an excuse to make the plot happen.
He has little to no arch in this story, unless you consider him appreciating his previous perfect life as an arch. He also tries to show he can take of himself… and fails throughout the entire VN, and even endangers everyone else in the group.
Yeah, we “see” his change in the epilogue and the “consequences” of the events in Echo. But, honestly, watching one scene, of one day of each period is barely exploring the consequences. Again, most of the consequences are explained through narrations and most development happens off screen.
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DEVON
The boyfriend of our main protagonist. He is one at fault for bringing everyone into this mess. But, the moment he wants to leave and EVERYONE else tries their best to die, it’s hard to really keep blaming him anymore.
He is… a pretty passive character actually. Like, really, after bringing Cam to Echo, he is completely stripped of agency in the story, his voice doesn’t matter, most of his actions don’t matter, he is just there for the ride.
Yeah, the story gives him motivation to be in Echo, but nothing is done with that. He is just so useless until the very end of the story that we have entire scenes dedicated to him trying and failing to do anything.
And, again, most of his backstory is not showed through actions but by long info dumps from the narrator.
​
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ARTURO
He is barely a character, he comes, give weed to Cameron and proceed to be there, and then he helps drag out the story. He is there just to fill space, he brings nothing to the table other than, you guessed, info dumps, explaining Cam, Devon and their relationship because writing actual relationships is hard.
I so much wished he died, but he survived thanks to the script.
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BRIAN
Our favorite useless serial killer (numbers in the two digits, hahahahahaha), he is here to turn this boring and dragged story into a “thriller” and cause some bodily harm to the protagonists.
Really, if it wasn’t for him, Arturo, the couple could have left the story a long time ago.
He wasn’t needed in the story, his section is pretty much filler and an excuse for some harm. Stupid motivations to keep everyone alive.
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DUKE
He only has two scenes. One where he fucks up Artie’s car so they can’t leave the town, and told them to leave the town because is dangerous. And a second scene where he helps one of them leave the town with his car.
Like, he is stupid and contradictory in only two appearances, he managed to be an deux ex machine and a plot device to drag the story.
It’s magical.
​
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ROMANCE
Well, the protagonist of this story is a couple, and we have plenty of scenes with them, such a shame most of their dynamics are TOLD to us instead of showed, most of their character is told rather than showed too. Their relationship is cute on the surface but lacks real depth, not because they cannot be complex, but rather because the plot demanded them to behave in a certain way so the plot can keep going.
Also, we are given plenty of reasons why Cameron loves Devon, but almost zero reason on why Devon loves Cameron. We are given a reason on why Devon had a crush on Cameron, but not how that developed into real love. Cameron’s reasons are explained around 20 times in the story, so pretty hard to miss that one.
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TOO LONG TOO MANY ENDINGS
Honestly, with how flat the characters were handled, this should have been a short VN, maybe just the first build.
About the endings, there is only one ending, but I see it as four. Let me explain. This story has four sections, each one with a clear ending that is then linked to the following sections, in a very artificial way.
· First Ending: and they never came back again
Devon and Cameron, after the first paranormal experience, decided to leave the town and drive back home. We could have had an ending about them exploring with other safer paranormal places, Devon explained Echo was especially dark.
But, this ending is ruined by Cameron seeing Sydney on the road, and making Devon crash the car. Also, Sydney is never seen or mentioned again, so I hope you enjoyed his cameo.
· Second Ending: I’m not Especial
After having a panic attack, Cameron realizes he had a perfect life already and decided to go back home with Devon, learning that he isn’t especial, that we wanted to feel useful with being a psychic. This could have been followed up with a nice ending of the couple working on making Cameron feel more useful without relying on his psychic ability.
But, this ending is ruined by Artie going into a forest and they followed him, and then Brian captured all of them.
· Third Ending: I found the Arch, mom
After defeating Brian, they are walking out of the cave and Cameron saw the real Arch to heaven, which can represent whatever you feel like, the theme with arches hasn’t been consistent nor especially focused on. So, it means Devon was the Arch, the arch means entering your new chapter in life, never coming back or whatever you feel like.
I would say it is open to interpretation, but given there are scenes to explain that Brian, the serial killer, is a bad person, I wouldn’t say this VN is really good with leaving interpretations to the reader.
· Fourth ending: Can you finish already?!
Then, we have an epilogue that is all the bad aspect in Echo and Adastra combined. Meaningless consequences that are mostly skipped and narrated instead of living with the characters, no real deathly consequences for the MC’s and yet a good ending with everyone being happy.
It’s magical.
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THE REAL THEME OF THE STORY: YOU CANNOT HAVE YOUR CAKE AND EAT IT TOO
It’s so magical how this story is full of contradictory ideas that fight to be true at the same time for the sake of the plot. Here is a little list of examples:
· Devon thinks psychology is not real, but believes in ghosts
· Devon is bad because he brought his boyfriend to Echo, also Cameron actually did want to go
· Devon no one lives in Echo, also Devon knows people live in Echo (he just conveniently fogot)
· Echo is safe, but also Brian lives there
· Artie studied psychology, also gives weed to a mentally ill guy with drug issues
· He remembers Cam was friends with his girlfriend because both had mental issues, also forgot Cam had mental issues.
· Duke wants them to leave Echo, also fucks up their car so they can’t leave
· Brian is serial killer with victims in the double digits, also can’t kill an inexperienced nerd, a drugged twink and a stupid high cat.
· Using drugs can ruin your life, also drugs lets you see ghosts and develop super powers.
And those are from the top of my head, there are more.
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MENTAL ILLNESS AND DRUG ABUSE
So, this the thing, the story features drug abuse and multiple mentions of mental illnesses, my issue with it is that it “features” them but it is not about them.
We like it or not, mental issues and drug abuse are mostly used for shock effect and plot device, but they are not genuinely explored in this VN. They are treated as nothing more than excuses to feel pity for the character and explains their actions, yet we don’t really spend that much time in the life of this characters to have a real grasp of them
For example, and they can be added to “cannot have your cake and eat it too”:
· Cameron has trauma for his father and mother suiciding, and he abused all kind of drugs during high school, but also he was a top student and even got a scholarship in one of the most prestigious colleges of the country.
· Devon used to be a party animal who abused a lot of weed, yet he was one of the top students too.
· Cameron has mental issues, but it’s been years since that really affected his life since he has been in a relationship with Devon (of course this is retconned constantly)
we just don’t expend enough time with this people to really get through those very real issues.
And then… we have combining someone he says sees thing which aren’t real with having psychic powers, seeing things that no one else can. And then, giving said person super powers by taking strong dangerous drugs that he himself said changes your entire life and can ruin them.
This is… this is just a mess.
It’s magical.
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CONCLUSION
This is one of the worst VNs that I have read, the worst from this writer, the second worst story in the Echoverse (Jenna’s route is still the worst), the worst VN in the Echoverse. The art is misguided and misused. Forgettable music. I just can’t recommend it at all.
Again, as I always say, if you like it and enjoy it, then good for you, I won’t shame you for that. But, I cannot really agree.
…
Well, time to go back and read some good VNs.
Also, Happy pride day/month

Memory transcription subject: Daniel Price, UTC Special Forces
Date [standardized human time]: September 8, 2140
I don’t know how long the fighting lasted. The sound of gunfire and flamethrower tanks detonating sank into white noise as we held out our position. Colton dealt with most of the initial wave before they even reached the building, but then came the second and the third waves. Halfway into the second onslaught Colton ran out of ammo for his rifle. Switching to his sidearm he assisted us with the defense of the sole entrance to the office. The desk proved sturdy enough to provide cover against enemy fire. Here Tassev’s machine gun did most of the heavy lifting, but we had to take over more than once when the gun's barrel overheated and needed to be switched out. If we had faced a similar amount of resistance trying to get in here we never would have taken this room in the first place.
During this time the Kolshian regained his senses, though he was content to stew silently while the fighting was still ongoing. I noticed him trying to wiggle from his binds more than once, but he got nowhere. We might have gone a little overboard restraining him, overcompensating for his unorthodox biology, but it was better to go overkill than to be surprised at the worst possible time.
I didn’t know what we would do if we ran out of ammo. Grab guns from those we already killed? Take the Governor hostage and attempt to make a break for it? No, we couldn’t carry Amja out with us if we attempted that. As I counted down my few remaining mags I came to the grim realization we couldn’t make it through another assault. With two Arxur on our side we had the advantage in a melee, but as the old saying goes, nobody wins in a knife fight. Steadying my aim through the doorway we waited for the fourth wave. In this lull I had a moment to process the horrid scene in front of me. Bodies were piled along the walkway all the way to the end of the hallway. At some points piled up where they had been used as makeshift cover. Most of our assailants had been Krakotl, whose purple blood dripped sickeningly down from the walkways onto the ballroom floor below. Of the few Yotul that had attacked, most were exterminators, though their charred bodies were hardly recognizable as such. At one point Tassev had managed to nail an exterminator’s tank and engulfed the entire hallway in a fireball. The building itself, despite the seemingly wood detailing, appeared to be fireproof thankfully. If it wasn’t we would be taking a tumble out the second story window by now to avoid being burned alive. Fur and feathers were noticeably more flammable than the manor itself however, and filled the air with a putrid stench. After a long enough pause in the fighting, Usli droned out the area and saw no remaining hostiles. If there were any survivors among the enemy, they retreated. With a sigh of relief I took count of our remaining ammo, and it didn’t look good. I ordered Tassev to collect guns from the fallen. Their ammo would be incompatible with our weapons, so if we ran out we would have to switch to them entirely. Only the manor's guards would have anything of value, lugging around the few intact flamethrowers was the last thing we wanted to do.
As Tassev vaulted the desk I turned to the rest of my squad, “The area’s secure, for now. I want this place turned upside down. Document anything and everything of interest. Colton, there’s got to be a radio or something somewhere in here, if we can get an update on how the battle’s going that would be nice. Usli, search around for any electronics and download anything they’ve got.” I got started searching through the desk which had provided us cover. Most of the documents within that weren't shredded by bullets were of no interest: economic spreadsheets, architectural plans for additions to the manner (all dated after 2139), some personal letters which I opted to document, etc.
There was some commotion as Usli seized the Governor’s holopad. “Quit moving!,” Usli shouted as he kicked the Kolshian, causing him to double over. In most instances I would have told him to cool it, but after what we had just been through I could think of worse ways to release some stress than beating on the SOB.
“Anything Colton,” I asked.
“Nothing. Well, there looks to be an old TV back here but I doubt we’ll get any channels. You know we could try contacting the shuttle again, it’s not like our position hasn’t already been compromised. If they’re still kicking they’ll be in contact with the fleet.”
Pulling out my radio I realized it had a bullet lodged in it. After a second of vertigo I dropped the ruined electronic and turned to Colton again, “Can I borrow yours? Mine is uh, shot. Literally.”
“Seriously? Damn, sure no problem.”
Tuning his radio to the right frequencies I started, “This is Taskforce Revenant calling out, does anyone copy?” Static was the only answer. “This is Captain Price of Taskforce Revenant, does anyone copy?”
“This is UTCS Luanda, over. We hear you loud and clear Taskforce Revenant.”
Wait, Luanda? That’s a battlecruiser, and for it to be contacting us directly… they’d have to be in atmosphere. “What’s the situation up there, we’ve been in the dark planetside.”
“You haven’t heard? Feds are running with their tails between their legs, Captain. We took some minor dings but nothing that won’t buff out. Terran forces have complete orbital control.”
I couldn’t keep the relief out of my voice as I answered back, “That’s great to hear. I need you to relay a message to Command. We are requesting immediate evac from the Yotul capital. Our current position is in a structure called the Chancellor’s Manor. We are in possession of a potential HVT, the military governor of Yotul Prime, and intel on Federation operations on the planet. We’ve been pinned down for, I don’t know, an hour maybe? The site is secure now, but we are low on ammunition and have a civilian in need of medical attention.”
“Relaying now. In the meantime stay put and we’ll have reinforcements sent via drop pod within 15 minutes.”
The whole atmosphere in the room lightened up. It was over. We won in space and soon enough the last holdouts on the planet would either surrender or be destroyed. I turned to Amja, who was still conscious, but obviously in pain, “You hear that? We won! The Yotul are free.” She cracked a weak smile.
“You haven’t won,” The Kolshian piped up. “You’ve freed no one, just enslaved them in ways they can’t see.”
“Well would you look at that,” Colton said. “He speaks! And here I was thinking the squid was a mute.”
“Mock me all you want, predator. It doesn’t change the fact that you are a blight on the galaxy. Nor does it change the outcome of this war.”
“I dunno, that’s a lot of tough talk for someone bound up and surrounded by ‘vicious’ predators.”
“Vile creature. We would have done well to exterminate you all before your corruption spread.”
“Alright I’ll bite,” Colton continued, “no pun intended. What do you have against predators? Don’t lie and say it’s because you’re afraid of me. Sure that applies to most Feds we’ve met, but you’re different. It’s in the way you talk. Your feeling towards us isn’t fear, it’s disgust.”
“How astute for a primate. Like I said, predators are a blight on the galaxy, a malignant tumor that consumes all that it touches. My kind creates order. Your kind only knows destruction. Nay, you are destruction, chaos manifest. It’s in your DNA, crucial to your very being that you must destroy to live. You humans hide behind your facade of ‘civilization’ better than the Arxur, but you can’t hide what you truly are underneath it all.” His frog-like eyes narrowed as his pupils darted between Usli and Amja. “Likewise, of all the predators in this room the stench radiates most readily from the two Yotul among you.”
“What are you on about?”
“Arguably worse than you are those who hide among us, harboring the instincts of a predator unbeknownst to others. They are diseased, no doubt, to stand your kind’s presence let alone work with you.” He looked directly at Usli, “One can call you violent, insolent, primitive, and it rolls off like water. But when I call you what you are, diseased, watch how you recoil. Because deep down you know your ruse has been found out!”
Usli did recoil slightly, but at the insult of being called primitive, not whatever nonsense the Kolshian was spewing. “Enough of that,” I interrupted. “If I have to listen to one more second of that squid’s tirade I am going to jump out a window. There’s nothing to gain from egging him on.” I looked to the Kolshian, “And you. You will only speak when spoken to or I’ll tape your mouth shut personally.”
Colton huffed and turned to dig through a filing cabinet. Jokingly he asked no one in particular, “You think they’ll give us front row seats if he gets the Kalsim treatment?”
Tassev returned with his arms full of weapons. I informed him of the situation and he opted to stand guard in front of the door rather than sort through files with the rest of us. It was probably for the best, I don’t think anyone else besides maybe Jath could withstand the stench that permeated the hall. Finding I had sorted through everything in the desk, I moved over to help Colton search the filing cabinets. After a minute or so of doing that Usli finally broke into the Kolshian’s holopad.
“Well well well, looks like someone left a lot of sensitive files on their personal device, tsk tsk tsk. You’d think you 'advanced' species have better OPSEC,” Usli said mockingly. “Daniel, you want to check this out? I’ll see if I can get that computer up and running again.
“Sure, let’s see,” I said, taking the holopad and flipping through random files. I thought out loud as I opened some, “We’ve got manifests offworld, all going to the same system interestingly enough. Renovation plans including a pleasure garden complete with a 800,000 gallon swimming pool. Always a good look when the people you govern are surviving off scraps. Exterminator incident reports, risk assessment meetings, wait…” I opened the folder of exterminator incident reports. The files were separated by what I assumed was the Federation equivalent of months and years. The dates were auto translated, but it made the subdivisions look somewhat arbitrary as a result. It went back to 2137 and there were thousands upon thousands of reports. “Usli, just how common were predators when you lived here?”
“Not at all. When there was a predator sighting it would make headlines for a week.”
I looked back to the holopad. Clicking on individual incidents revealed more in depth details. The exterminators on the call, what precinct they were with, the location of the incident, resolution, and more. Under resolution every single one was marked DEPURATION. I scrolled down, and it just kept going. Eventually I found a couple instances of other resolutions: TERMINATION, INCONCLUSIVE, and RELOCATION. I opened up other pages, other times, and it was all the same. The number of incidents were excessive. Trying to scroll to the bottom of one subsection I gave up after a solid minute flying past thousands of reports with no end in sight.
“Under Exterminator incident reports there’s thousands of incidents. Almost every single one has its resolution marked as depuration.”
“What?,” Usli said, looking up from the computer. “Let me see.”
“It just keeps going, there must be tens, hundreds of thousands of individual reports.”
“That can’t be right. The Federation wiped out almost every predator on the planet during the uplift.”
I looked back to Amja, she was stone-faced staring at the Kolshian. “Those aren’t wild predators, those are people. The people you took.”
The Kolshian remained silent.
I allowed Usli to take the holopad and focused my attention on the cephalopoid. “What’s the meaning of this?”
The Kolshian took on an uncanny expression, I couldn’t tell if it was his species’ equivalent of a smile or glare. “If you must know, this world was infested when we took custodianship over the Yotul. It is little wonder that they planned to join you. Our scientists during first contact must have had faulty equipment. Either that or our screenings have become far more effective in the last few decades, because cases of predator disease were 256% more prevalent in the Yotul population than the galaxy at large. Perhaps a vestigial remnant of predator ancestors, but I digress. Cases of the disease were even more prevalent among the ruling class as well, being 37% more common in that demographic even when using a Yotul baseline. We simply did what was necessary.”
“And what was ‘necessary’?”
“Hmm, less perceptive than your pack member? Recalling our previous conversation, what do you do to a cancer?”
I knew damn well what he was alluding to, but I needed a straight answer right from his mouth, “I don’t know. Elaborate.”
He groaned, as if bored by the interrogation, “I knew your medicine was primitive, but I had no idea-”
“Answer. The. Question.”
“Hmph. A cancer cannot be allowed to take hold and spread. You are presented with two options, curtail its means of replication or cut it out.”
A stunned silence purveyed the room. I turned and snatched the holopad from Usli’s hands, he made no reaction to this action. I could feel anger slipping into my voice as I said, “All of these ‘incidents’. All of these people. What did you do to them?! And don’t answer me with any analogies or euphemisms! Tell me the truth!”
“We removed them from the general population and salvaged the ones we could. The ones that couldn’t be saved… well originally it would have been a matter of continuing their segregation from the populous and implementing strict population controls, but with the food shortages your kind have caused these past few years I had to make a decision. Why should healthy citizens go hungry because of individuals who are a net deficit to society.”
I stood in silence taking in his answer. The implication was obvious, but the bastard refused to outright say it. Hatred boiled to the surface as I replied, “You starved them.”
“Sending food to this backwater was already a low priority when core worlds needed to be fed. So why not dispose of the refuse of this world and save some for those that remained? Sure a more expedited method could have been chosen, but if the goal is to conserve resources then why spend more to achieve the same result faster?”
“You genocidal motherfucker. How many?” I flipped through the lists faster and faster before throwing the holopad to the floor. “How many millions of innocents did you murder for your perfect world?”
Though the Kolshian’s expression was hard to judge, it took on a look akin to annoyance as he sat silently in front of me.
“Answer me you piece of shit!” I yelled, “You killed all of these people, and for what? Because they had this ‘predator disease’? Murdered them just because they were different, just because they didn’t fit your vision? How many did you starve under the pretense of this pseudoscientific bullshit?!”
The Kolshian’s calm demeanor cracked as he grew incensed at my direct attack on his ideology. He barked, “Not enough!”
“Y-you monster…”, Usli stuttered, backing up out of my peripheral vision in shock.
The Kolshian’s eyes narrowed on Usli again. “Says the one in league with predators! The gall of you to call me the monster.” He looked back to me, “And none of your poisoned, ignorant, words would make me hesitate for an instant to continue my work! You call me a murderer as if your kind is any better. I know what you are even if you refuse to acknowledge it. At least I served to promote the greater good. What ends did the genocides in your own history serve? Exactly, your silence speaks volumes. What is the price of millions when my work serves to save billions? I will not grovel to you beasts or beg for your faux mercy. My only regret is that now all of those deaths will be for nothing. We wasted so much time and so many resources trying to uplift these primitives. And what did we get in return? Nothing! On second thought, I lied. I also regret that I didn’t kill more of these disease ridden, backstabbing, primi-”
A single gunshot rang out, splattering blue blood across my face as the Kolshian slumped over, trailing blood on the wall behind him. I turned around to see Usli standing there, arm shaking, with a pistol in hand. Hearing the gunshot, Tassev vaulted into the room, gun at the ready, before stopping dead in his tracks upon observing the scene in front of him. Silence overtook us as we stood there in shock. Slowly I stepped back and dropped my rifle to the floor. Holding out my arms I approached Usli. The conflicted expression on his face contradicted the action he had just committed. Stepping forward I calmly spoke, “Take it easy, Usli. Put down the gun.” His grip became shakier, but he was still pointing it straight ahead. He breathed out and blinked rapidly. His composure was barely maintained as his breathing accelerated. “It’s okay bud, just put it down. I’m right here, look at me.”
His pupils darted to me and back forward multiple times before he drew his arm back and threw the pistol at the dead Kolshian. Wasting no time he lunged forward, unleashing a barrage of stomps and kicks on the body. He let out a shrill cry before screaming, “HOW’S THAT FOR PRIMITIVE YOU FEDERATION FUCK!”
Tassev immediately moved in to restrain our friend, but even with the massive Arxur grabbing both of his arms his fury was barely contained, his only focus being the dead Kolshian in front of him. “FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU! I’LL KILL YOU ALL! EVERY LAST GODDAMN ONE OF YOU! I’LL FUCKING KILL YOU ALL! LET GO OF ME!”
Jath moved in and helped Tassev restrain his arms. I never thought in all my years I would see two imposing Arxur struggle to keep hold of a single Yotul, but Usli fought like a man possessed. I snapped out of shock and rushed in front of him, grabbing a leg as he kicked blindly. Finally we were able to take him off balance and pin him to the floor. He was still screaming profanities at the top of his lungs as I tried to get through to him. “Pull yourself together man! It’s us! Chill, chill!” He thrashed like a wild animal caught in a trap, looking in every direction as he expended his finite supply of energy trying to escape our grasp.
“LET ME AT HIM! LET ME GO! I’LL KILL EVERY ONE OF THOSE TENTACLED FREAKS, I SWEAR IT!”
Jath was next to try and calm him, “Relax, look at me. Look at me! It’s me. It’s okay, we’re here. Stop fighting. STOP!”
“I’LL, I- I…” His thrashes waned in intensity and we were finally able to let go. With the last of his energy he curled into a ball on the floor and began sobbing. I stumbled to my feet and tried to catch my breath. Usli’s mumbled words in between sobs were unintelligible, with the only one I could parse being “father”. Wiping the blood from my face, I hunched over the Kolshian. He was dead, no doubt. The bullet went right between his eyes.
I paced in front of the body, how the fuck were we going to explain this to Command? Usli just executed a prisoner, a top ranking official that they would very much have liked to have alive. The bastard had it coming a thousand times over, but fuck not like this! What would they do? Strip him of his rank? Court-martial and imprison him? I walked over to Colton, who was standing off to the side close to Amja. I turned him away from the rest and whispered, “This is bad, this is seriously fucked.”
“What do we do?”
“I don’t know. Last thing Command heard was that we had an HVT ready for extraction and now he’s dead on the floor. You can’t just hide that!”
“But if we tell the truth?”
“They’ll court-martial him. At best they’ll find the circumstances such that he’ll be honorably discharged.”
“And worst case?”
“You already know.”
Colton put a fist to his mouth, trying to think, and muttered a curse under his breath. We stood there for a moment contemplating our options when Amja spoke up, “I did it.”
In unison we turned and responded, “What?”
“I shot the Governor. I killed him.”
Usli, who by now had buried his face in Jath’s shoulder, stepped back on shaky legs and looked at her. His voice came out as a hoarse whisper, “N-no. You shouldn’t take the blame. I did it. It’s my fault. My responsibility.”
“No it ain’t. You did nothing wrong, he deserved every bit of it. Besides, I had the motive.” With some difficulty she unholstered her firearm with her still functioning offhand, “And the means. It was out of your control, you were interrogating him and I shot him, as I intended to from the beginning. I deceived you so I could get revenge, like Ugo warned me not to do.” She looked at me and gestured with her gun, “Take it.”
I hesitated.
“Take it, you wouldn’t let me keep it after what I did.”
I grabbed the gun and inspected it for a moment. I sighed and, crouching down to her level, fired several times, hitting the Kolshian’s body in various locations while purposefully missing a shot or two. Standing up I explained to her, “I imagine you’re not a great shot with your offhand.” That would hold up in the AAR. It would have to. With the last piece of evidence planted it was time to complete the ruse.
“UTCS Luanda, this is Taskforce Revenant do you copy?”
“Copy What’s the situation?”
I took in a deep breath, and let it out before continuing, “High value target is KIA.”
“What happened?”
My gaze wandered to Usli, who was back in Jath’s embrace. “The civilian in our company killed him. I was interrogating the subject when she opened fire. She’s been stripped of any weapons and is cooperative.”
“Roger, ETA on reinforcements is 5 minutes.”
Putting the radio down I fell backwards into a chair and let out a deep breath, slumping forward to cradle my head in my hands. All there was to do now was wait for evac.

Bonus chapter to celebrate 100 followers on Royal Road. Hopefully we're just getting started.
Previous Chapter - Read 10 weeks ahead on Patreon - Read the story so far on Royal Road
*
Chapter Twelve - The Blacksmith's Boy (Part One)
‘Lokk?’
Lokk glanced over his shoulder at the sound, frowning, and thought better of responding. Carel could manage without him a few moments longer.
‘Is someone calling you?’ The girl beside him asked, looking up at him with large eyes. Wanda, her name was, with a set of generous, pleasing dimples either side of a smiling mouth, freckled skin framed with a shock of crimson hair. His age. Maybe a year or so older. Who could tell? Who would care? Fifty men and women called Rindon home. Ten were close to his age. Four of them were women. Three of those weren’t his kin, and only one of those wasn’t already sick of the sight of him. Not yet, anyway.
‘Lokk?’ She asked him again, and he met her eye, brushing a strand of fair hair back from his brow.
‘They’ll wait.’ He told her, favouring her with a careless smile. ‘What were you saying? About your mother?’
‘Lokk!’ The call came again, louder this time, and accompanied by a loud clatter of pots through the kitchen door. He flinched, glancing up irritably. When he looked down again, Wanda was frowning, dimples dimpling into a polite, if apologetic, smile.
‘I… had best be going.’
‘Wait, Wanda, I...’ But she was already gone, hurrying off through the little maze of tables and chairs towards the Nest’s door. Lokk watched her go, not a little wistfully, ignoring a quiet smirk from one of the early arrivals. Then he sighed and went out through the door behind the bar, scowling.
The heat in the kitchen was thick with vapour. Steam poured out of a large pot hung swinging over the fire, steam that smelled of scavenged herbs and stale meat. Carel was standing beside it, stirring the contents with a ladle longer than her arm, pale hair tied back in a tight knot behind her head. On the counter beside her, the desiccated remains of a half-dozen different vegetables. The meat had left nothing behind.
‘What?’ He asked irritably, closing the door behind him.
‘What do you think?’ His sister replied, shooting him an irritable glance over her shoulder. ‘I don’t think me doing all the work whilst you drink our casks dry is what Da had in mind.’
‘I wasn’t just drinking.’ He told her. An apron was hanging up by the door, and he hung it sullenly over his shoulders, frowning. ‘Besides, you look like you were managing just fine without me.’
Carel snorted. ‘Someone had to.’
‘You’re much better at it than me, anyways.’ He added offhandedly, taking the ladle from her hands and sipping appreciatively from the little bowl of brownish broth. ‘Leave me to the casks. I’ll keep them company instead.’
‘I’m only better at it because Da taught me.’ Carel told him, scowling. ‘And he only taught me because he knew you’d be off trying to bed every girl in the village whenever his back’s turned. How is Maddy, by the way?’
‘Wanda.’ He corrected.
Carel snorted. ‘Anything that breathes, I suppose.’
Lokk gave her a hurt look. ‘Now, I’d hardly say anyth-‘
‘That’s actually my point.’ She interrupted him, snatching back the ladle. ‘You would say anything, if it got you what you wanted. Now make yourself useful and cut some bread.’
‘No need to be hurtful.’ He told her with a frown, going over to the counter and snatching up a knife. ‘Would be much simpler if I only had eyes for one someone. Not all of us have it so easy.’
He ducked just in time as part of a turnip crunched into the wall beside his head.
‘You’re right, I’m better off without your help!’ Carel told him, turning back to the pot. ‘Go back to your barrels.’
‘Thought you’d never ask.’ He shrugged the apron off his shoulders, and ducked through the door, just as another dismembered vegetable whistled past his ear.
Back in the common room, a few more of the villagers had assembled around one of the tables near the fire, making the early overtures of evening conversation around the edges of their ale mugs. Da had emerged from the Nest’s bowels, and was now skirting the table skilfully, fresh cask under arm. Lokk took his place behind the bar, doing his best to look busy. It was only then he noticed the other table. Further from the fire, this one. Quieter, too. Dark cloaks, dark faces. Lokk didn’t recognise them, and there wasn’t anyone in Rindon he didn’t know. As he watched, one of them looked up towards him with dark eyes, and he looked away, busying himself polishing a particularly stubborn mug.
‘You look busy.’
Da had appeared at his side, setting the cask down on the bar with a little sigh of effort. His rosy cheeks were rosier than ever, and his clothes smelt of pipe-smoke.
‘I am busy.’
‘I suppose your sister didn’t need your help?’ The innkeep smiled knowingly, taking his old pipe from a pocket in his shirt and rubbing it clean on his sleeve.
‘Said so herself.’
‘Course she did.’
‘I-’
‘Well, it was a fucking storm wasn’t it. Not every little shower gets farted out a wizard’s arse.’ Albin, the butcher, exclaimed from near the fire. Overtures done then. Time for an argument. Lokk might have smiled, had he not been so terribly bored by it all.
‘This is a long one. They’ll be here a while yet.’ Da told him thoughtfully, chewing idly at the nib of his pipe. He frowned. His Ma had hated that thing. But Ma was gone, and it wouldn’t do any good, thinking about her. ‘We’ll need another cask.’
‘Older the better?’
‘Oldest the best.’ The innkeep agreed, grinning at him.
Lokk nodded and turned towards the door, then hesitated.
‘I don’t know them folk.’ He said quietly, nodding towards the little group of dark figures sitting away from the fire. The innkeep caught his look and frowned.
‘Solen’s new hands. Lowlanders.’ He replied, tamping some weed into the end of his pipe with the end of his thumb. ‘Nosey bunch. He’s got a few more besides, I hears. Must be a busy season up at the mine.’
Lokk frowned. ‘Do mines have busy seasons?’
‘Damned if I know. Keep to ‘emselves, mostly, anyways. Been here best part of a month, I reckon. Had one of ‘em in here asking questions, few days back, nothing since.’ The innkeep stopped fiddling with his pipe for a moment, giving his son a sideways look. ‘Still, they pay their way. Up front. Which is more than I can say for most of this lot.’
Lokk stole one last look at the quiet table of strangers, then turned and went out through a side door and into the night beyond, leaving Da at the bar alone.
The cold air bit at his skin as he emerged into the dark, and he shivered, shrugging himself a little deeper into his shirt. Winter came quickly, this close to the Teeth, filling the rocks with the kind of deep, dark cold that lasted well into spring. Presently, a rumbling cloud of purpling rain was drawing in over the mountains, and the wind was picking up. Lokk shivered again, scowling. Just his luck to catch the rain.
He made his way around the side of the sloping roof of the inn, head low against the gathering whine of the wind. Another night, another cask. Another squabble over nothing by the fire. Another restless sleep, wrapped in cold blankets. Alone. Summer was bad enough, but winter in the foothills was slower than a monk in a brothel. The women, such as they were, stayed home, for the most part. Those that did make it to the Nest didn’t wait out the first mugs. Even Cal had stopped calling, this past month.
Overheard, a pale flash of light, followed by a distant rumble. Rain had started, somewhere off up the slopes. Lokk aimed another choice curse at no one in particular. No women, no friends. No money. It was a sorry state of affairs, if ever he’d seen one.
He reached the store and began fiddling with the lock with numb fingers, frowning. It was hardly Cal’s fault, he knew. That blacksmith was quite mad. Everyone knew it. Locked up in that old forge, hammering away, night and day. Lokk had seen him a few times. Fonder of glaring than talking. Wasn’t exactly afraid of him, but he certainly didn’t like him. Big tree of a man, arms thick as thighs, had to stoop to get through most doorways. And his eyes! Lokk shivered again. Felt like ice on your skin when he looked at you. Strays like Cal couldn’t be choosers, Lokk knew that well enough. But if he was him, he’d have run off years ago.
The latch finally gave, and he swung the door open with a triumphant snort. He felt his way along the row of casks closest to the door, where the older ones were, fumbling in the dark. Behind him, the thunder crashed against the side of the hills, vibrating through his boots, and he flinched in spite of himself. If that mad blacksmith was going to keep Cal locked up like some trained animal, he’d have to get by without him. Not like Cal was the best company, anyway, these days. Always had been a strange one, but pale eyes had started getting far too clever for his own good, recently. More full of secrets than a Westri merchant. Sometimes he wondered if Cal saw the world the rest of them did, or one entirely his own. And then there was the Carel problem.
His hand settled on the cask closest to the far wall, and he dragged it grumbling from its place, wedging it under one arm. No, he could hardly blame Cal for any of it. He was just bored. Still, better bored at the inn than locked up in that damn forge with the cracked old blacksmith and his scarred face. He snorted under his breath, shivering at the thought. They’d been talking about leaving for years now. Going west. Arinath, maybe, Uldoroth, even. Men could make a good living in the white stones, so they’d heard. Makers knew they couldn’t stay here forever. Run the inn? Take up mining? No, they wouldn’t be here, forever. Maybe this year. Maybe next. But they’d get there. Tough place, the Lowlands, but they’d look out for each other. Always had. Besides, couldn’t be any tougher than these fucking hills. He wondered if Carel would follow them there, too. Who’d do the Nest's cooking, then?
He was halfway to the door when he heard it. The slow whisper of a thousand thousand breaths, brushes on the stones, rippling closer. He hesitated for a moment, then cursed, staggering for the door, cask slipping against his arm. The rain caught him on the doorstep, turning him silver with a layer of frigid water, and he spilled clumsily into the firelight beyond, nearly dropping the cask.
‘Easy!’
‘I’ve got it!’ He snapped back, straightening and setting it down on the bar beside the other. Da had got his pipe lit in the time Lokk had been outside, and the little twisting strings of smoke were curling upwards from his whiskered mouth. Carel was beside him, spooning her steaming brown broth into three small bowls on the bar.
‘Just in time for dinner.’ Da told him, sucking on his pipe.
‘As always.’ Carel murmured.
‘I-’
‘You look wet.’
‘I swear to-’
‘Get the door, will you. You trying to let the storm in?’
Lokk scowled, latching the door, and snatched up his bowl silently. He looked out at the rest of the common room, savouring the heat of the fire for a moment. Just as he left it. Of course it was. What would have changed?
‘What about Isandur, then?’ One of the villagers beside the fire was asking. Lokk snorted.
‘This one, again?’
‘It’s a good story.’ Da said quietly, blowing a little stream of smoke through his pursed lips.
‘Heard it a half-dozen times already, this month.’
‘Don’t let Godry hear you talking rot.’ Carel told him, taking up her own bowl and stirring it gently. ‘Wouldn’t want him giving it up. Albin would have to take over.’
Lokk’s eyes caught the little group of strangers again, sitting in the shadows away from the fire. Talking quietly amongst themselves. Dark cloaks and dour faces. At least that was new. They even looked like they might be more bored than he was.
Outside, the rain drummed down over the thatching, and the wind whined over the hills. He sighed, and took a mouthful of the steaming, tasteless stew, frowning to himself. Another night. Another boring fucking night.

Bonus chapter to celebrate 100 followers on Royal Road. Hopefully we're just getting started.
Series Page - Read 10 weeks ahead on Patreon - Read the story so far on Royal Road
*
Chapter Twelve - The Blacksmith's Boy (Part One)
‘Lokk?’ Lokk glanced over his shoulder at the sound, frowning, and thought better of responding. Carel could manage without him a few moments longer. ‘Is someone calling you?’ The girl beside him asked, looking up at him with large eyes. Wanda, her name was, with a set of generous, pleasing dimples either side of a smiling mouth, freckled skin framed with a shock of crimson hair. His age. Maybe a year or so older. Who could tell? Who would care? Fifty men and women called Rindon home. Ten were close to his age. Four of them were women. Three of those weren’t his kin, and only one of those wasn’t already sick of the sight of him. Not yet, anyway. ‘Lokk?’ She asked him again, and he met her eye, brushing a strand of fair hair back from his brow. ‘They’ll wait.’ He told her, favouring her with a careless smile. ‘What were you saying? About your mother?’ ‘Lokk!’ The call came again, louder this time, and accompanied by a loud clatter of pots through the kitchen door. He flinched, glancing up irritably. When he looked down again, Wanda was frowning, dimples dimpling into a polite, if apologetic, smile. ‘I… had best be going.’ ‘Wait, Wanda, I...’ But she was already gone, hurrying off through the little maze of tables and chairs towards the Nest’s door. Lokk watched her go, not a little wistfully, ignoring a quiet smirk from one of the early arrivals. Then he sighed and went out through the door behind the bar, scowling. The heat in the kitchen was thick with vapour. Steam poured out of a large pot hung swinging over the fire, steam that smelled of scavenged herbs and stale meat. Carel was standing beside it, stirring the contents with a ladle longer than her arm, pale hair tied back in a tight knot behind her head. On the counter beside her, the desiccated remains of a half-dozen different vegetables. The meat had left nothing behind. ‘What?’ He asked irritably, closing the door behind him. ‘What do you think?’ His sister replied, shooting him an irritable glance over her shoulder. ‘I don’t think me doing all the work whilst you drink our casks dry is what Da had in mind.’ ‘I wasn’t just drinking.’ He told her. An apron was hanging up by the door, and he hung it sullenly over his shoulders, frowning. ‘Besides, you look like you were managing just fine without me.’ Carel snorted. ‘Someone had to.’ ‘You’re much better at it than me, anyways.’ He added offhandedly, taking the ladle from her hands and sipping appreciatively from the little bowl of brownish broth. ‘Leave me to the casks. I’ll keep them company instead.’ ‘I’m only better at it because Da taught me.’ Carel told him, scowling. ‘And he only taught me because he knew you’d be off trying to bed every girl in the village whenever his back’s turned. How is Maddy, by the way?’ ‘Wanda.’ He corrected. Carel snorted. ‘Anything that breathes, I suppose.’ Lokk gave her a hurt look. ‘Now, I’d hardly say anyth-‘ ‘That’s actually my point.’ She interrupted him, snatching back the ladle. ‘You would say anything, if it got you what you wanted. Now make yourself useful and cut some bread.’ ‘No need to be hurtful.’ He told her with a frown, going over to the counter and snatching up a knife. ‘Would be much simpler if I only had eyes for one someone. Not all of us have it so easy.’ He ducked just in time as part of a turnip crunched into the wall beside his head. ‘You’re right, I’m better off without your help!’ Carel told him, turning back to the pot. ‘Go back to your barrels.’ ‘Thought you’d never ask.’ He shrugged the apron off his shoulders, and ducked through the door, just as another dismembered vegetable whistled past his ear. Back in the common room, a few more of the villagers had assembled around one of the tables near the fire, making the early overtures of evening conversation around the edges of their ale mugs. Da had emerged from the Nest’s bowels, and was now skirting the table skilfully, fresh cask under arm. Lokk took his place behind the bar, doing his best to look busy. It was only then he noticed the other table. Further from the fire, this one. Quieter, too. Dark cloaks, dark faces. Lokk didn’t recognise them, and there wasn’t anyone in Rindon he didn’t know. As he watched, one of them looked up towards him with dark eyes, and he looked away, busying himself polishing a particularly stubborn mug. ‘You look busy.’ Da had appeared at his side, setting the cask down on the bar with a little sigh of effort. His rosy cheeks were rosier than ever, and his clothes smelt of pipe-smoke. ‘I am busy.’ ‘I suppose your sister didn’t need your help?’ The innkeep smiled knowingly, taking his old pipe from a pocket in his shirt and rubbing it clean on his sleeve. ‘Said so herself.’ ‘Course she did.’ ‘I-’ ‘Well, it was a fucking storm wasn’t it. Not every little shower gets farted out a wizard’s arse.’ Albin, the butcher, exclaimed from near the fire. Overtures done then. Time for an argument. Lokk might have smiled, had he not been so terribly bored by it all. ‘This is a long one. They’ll be here a while yet.’ Da told him thoughtfully, chewing idly at the nib of his pipe. He frowned. His Ma had hated that thing. But Ma was gone, and it wouldn’t do any good, thinking about her. ‘We’ll need another cask.’ ‘Older the better?’ ‘Oldest the best.’ The innkeep agreed, grinning at him. Lokk nodded and turned towards the door, then hesitated. ‘I don’t know them folk.’ He said quietly, nodding towards the little group of dark figures sitting away from the fire. The innkeep caught his look and frowned. ‘Solen’s new hands. Lowlanders.’ He replied, tamping some weed into the end of his pipe with the end of his thumb. ‘Nosey bunch. He’s got a few more besides, I hears. Must be a busy season up at the mine.’ Lokk frowned. ‘Do mines have busy seasons?’ ‘Damned if I know. Keep to ‘emselves, mostly, anyways. Been here best part of a month, I reckon. Had one of ‘em in here asking questions, few days back, nothing since.’ The innkeep stopped fiddling with his pipe for a moment, giving his son a sideways look. ‘Still, they pay their way. Up front. Which is more than I can say for most of this lot.’ Lokk stole one last look at the quiet table of strangers, then turned and went out through a side door and into the night beyond, leaving Da at the bar alone. The cold air bit at his skin as he emerged into the dark, and he shivered, shrugging himself a little deeper into his shirt. Winter came quickly, this close to the Teeth, filling the rocks with the kind of deep, dark cold that lasted well into spring. Presently, a rumbling cloud of purpling rain was drawing in over the mountains, and the wind was picking up. Lokk shivered again, scowling. Just his luck to catch the rain. He made his way around the side of the sloping roof of the inn, head low against the gathering whine of the wind. Another night, another cask. Another squabble over nothing by the fire. Another restless sleep, wrapped in cold blankets. Alone. Summer was bad enough, but winter in the foothills was slower than a monk in a brothel. The women, such as they were, stayed home, for the most part. Those that did make it to the Nest didn’t wait out the first mugs. Even Cal had stopped calling, this past month. Overheard, a pale flash of light, followed by a distant rumble. Rain had started, somewhere off up the slopes. Lokk aimed another choice curse at no one in particular. No women, no friends. No money. It was a sorry state of affairs, if ever he’d seen one. He reached the store and began fiddling with the lock with numb fingers, frowning. It was hardly Cal’s fault, he knew. That blacksmith was quite mad. Everyone knew it. Locked up in that old forge, hammering away, night and day. Lokk had seen him a few times. Fonder of glaring than talking. Wasn’t exactly afraid of him, but he certainly didn’t like him. Big tree of a man, arms thick as thighs, had to stoop to get through most doorways. And his eyes! Lokk shivered again. Felt like ice on your skin when he looked at you. Strays like Cal couldn’t be choosers, Lokk knew that well enough. But if he was him, he’d have run off years ago. The latch finally gave, and he swung the door open with a triumphant snort. He felt his way along the row of casks closest to the door, where the older ones were, fumbling in the dark. Behind him, the thunder crashed against the side of the hills, vibrating through his boots, and he flinched in spite of himself. If that mad blacksmith was going to keep Cal locked up like some trained animal, he’d have to get by without him. Not like Cal was the best company, anyway, these days. Always had been a strange one, but pale eyes had started getting far too clever for his own good, recently. More full of secrets than a Westri merchant. Sometimes he wondered if Cal saw the world the rest of them did, or one entirely his own. And then there was the Carel problem. His hand settled on the cask closest to the far wall, and he dragged it grumbling from its place, wedging it under one arm. No, he could hardly blame Cal for any of it. He was just bored. Still, better bored at the inn than locked up in that damn forge with the cracked old blacksmith and his scarred face. He snorted under his breath, shivering at the thought. They’d been talking about leaving for years now. Going west. Arinath, maybe, Uldoroth, even. Men could make a good living in the white stones, so they’d heard. Makers knew they couldn’t stay here forever. Run the inn? Take up mining? No, they wouldn’t be here, forever. Maybe this year. Maybe next. But they’d get there. Tough place, the Lowlands, but they’d look out for each other. Always had. Besides, couldn’t be any tougher than these fucking hills. He wondered if Carel would follow them there, too. Who’d do the Nest's cooking, then? He was halfway to the door when he heard it. The slow whisper of a thousand thousand breaths, brushes on the stones, rippling closer. He hesitated for a moment, then cursed, staggering for the door, cask slipping against his arm. The rain caught him on the doorstep, turning him silver with a layer of frigid water, and he spilled clumsily into the firelight beyond, nearly dropping the cask. ‘Easy!’ ‘I’ve got it!’ He snapped back, straightening and setting it down on the bar beside the other. Da had got his pipe lit in the time Lokk had been outside, and the little twisting strings of smoke were curling upwards from his whiskered mouth. Carel was beside him, spooning her steaming brown broth into three small bowls on the bar. ‘Just in time for dinner.’ Da told him, sucking on his pipe. ‘As always.’ Carel murmured. ‘I-’ ‘You look wet.’ ‘I swear to-’ ‘Get the door, will you. You trying to let the storm in?’ Lokk scowled, latching the door, and snatched up his bowl silently. He looked out at the rest of the common room, savouring the heat of the fire for a moment. Just as he left it. Of course it was. What would have changed? ‘What about Isandur, then?’ One of the villagers beside the fire was asking. Lokk snorted. ‘This one, again?’ ‘It’s a good story.’ Da said quietly, blowing a little stream of smoke through his pursed lips. ‘Heard it a half-dozen times already, this month.’ ‘Don’t let Godry hear you talking rot.’ Carel told him, taking up her own bowl and stirring it gently. ‘Wouldn’t want him giving it up. Albin would have to take over.’ Lokk’s eyes caught the little group of strangers again, sitting in the shadows away from the fire. Talking quietly amongst themselves. Dark cloaks and dour faces. At least that was new. They even looked like they might be more bored than he was. Outside, the rain drummed down over the thatching, and the wind whined over the hills. He sighed, and took a mouthful of the steaming, tasteless stew, frowning to himself. Another night. Another boring fucking night.

Hey everyone. I'm one of the owners in the dynastyfootballleague and I'm looking for replacement owners for 2023. We will be headed into year 12! We have paid out about $30,000 over the life of our league. Below you will find a link to our MFL page and Rules/Bylaws.
Our lineup this upcoming season will consist of:
QB, 2RB, 2WR, TE, 3 Offensive FLEX, K, 2DL, 2LB, 2DB, 3 Defensive FLEX. This is a very deep league with lots of ways to build a winning roster! Rules discussions happen annually with input for new owners.
This is an extremely unique and fun league to be apart of. Our 72 teams are divided up by 6 different divisions. We do not allow cross division trading and drafts are exclusive to each division. Our Championship bracket consists of 4 teams from each division to make 24 total. We also have a separate 6 team divisional bracket that pays 50 dollars to 6 different champions and includes naming rights for your division for the year.
Speaking of prizes, the winner of our league gets a top prize of $1,000 and an awesome owl trophy! The top 8 teams will get paid from our championship bracket. On top of the championship/divisional brackets we have a NFL year long pick em, a survivor league, a second chance/losers bracket prize, a season long high score prize, and you also get paid 30 bucks for each week you have the top score.
LINK TO LEAGUEPAGE
LIST OF AVAILABLE ASSETS
RULES
Our league dues are $50. As you can see the upside is huge, and the opportunities to make money and win are numerous. We have a great group of active owners who love to chat and trade. We utilize Discord to have a league-wide chat along with division specific chats.
In our league we have new owners join through a dispersal draft. We start with a lottery to order new owners, then you will have the opportunity to join a division and draft from the pool of available players. All players and picks owned by owners that left will be included in the dispersal. Any team listed as Open on the home page will be part of the dispersal draft. The asset list linked above shows you which players and picks will be available in the dispersal drafts for each division.
We will ask that new owners pay for this year and next year to ensure you are serious about participating. Most owners pay a year in advance anyways because our rules require it in order to trade future picks. While we don't know how many open spots we'll have yet if you express interest now you'll certainly get a spot.
If you are interested or you have any questions that you'd like answered before joining feel free to reach out to me via DM or just replying in this thread.

I want to start this off by saying there is still going to be plenty of money to be made this bull run. With that being said, I don't think we are going to be soaring to the heights some of us want to see, myself included.
I saw a post here that "theorized" that BTC will hit a per-coin value of $350k this bull run. We would all love that to happen, but I just don't think it's a reasonable theory. In fact, after I did some basic, back-of-napkin math, I'm not even sure we can crack $100k this time around.
Before I start showing my work, I want to be clear that I want BTC to fly to the fucking moon. I'd much rather see it hit $350k than the figure I came to, but the historical figures show that things are flattening. It's important to keep an objective perspective of these things so when the mania does come you aren't caught up in the greed of the moment.
Let's begin. In my eyes, BTC has had four true market peaks. 2011, 2013, 2017, and 2021. The data I will be examining is the peak-to-peak value as a percentage gain. Essentially, if you bought BTC at the top of one cycle, but sold at the top of the next cycle, how much you would have gained.
The p2p gain between 2011 and 2013 was 3558%, enough to turn a $100 investment into $355,800
The p2p gain between 2013 and 2017 was 1362%, enough to turn a $100 investment into $136,200
The p2p gain between 2017 and 2021 was 228%, enough to turn a $100 investment into $22,800
Obviously, the gains between bull runs are shrinking, but what is really interesting is just how much of a decline is occurring.
The difference between the first and second p2p measurements is about 60%, and the difference between the second and third p2p measurements is 84%. Are you beginning to see where this is going?
Now we get into the prediction part of this little write-up. Let's say for the sake of easy math that BTC peaked at exactly $70k in 2021. We know that each p2p cycle is smaller than the last, so it's not going to be a 228% gain, it has to be smaller. Now, since we are working with an extremely small number of data points I'm going to propose a pretty wide range, but I want to emphasize that I think the high likelihood is on the lower end of the range.
If we hold a 228% gain then the peak of the next cycle will be about $160k, this is what I would consider total moonshot territory.
If the p2p gain is 60% less than the previous p2p gain, then the peak next cycle will be about $134k
If the p2p gain is 84% less than the previous p2p gain, then the peak next cycle will only be $95.5k
If the p2p gain is even worse, we may be lucky to crack $80k this time around.
I want to see BTC hit insane numbers just as much as the rest of you. I also want to reiterate that these gains are still way more than traditional investments so the numbers are still nothing to scoff at, especially if you're buying now. What's important is that we take the time today to temper our expectations and develop an exit strategy before the mania takes over.
How vehemently do you disagree with this assessment?

So my story is about shapeshifting characters aiming to save the environment. I've tried to create a lore and backstory for how the planet Earth was created. It is based entirely on the theory of evolution, but I want to sprinkle in mythology of the nature gods being involved in the creation and evolution of the Earth and its creatures. It's going to be my prologue for my first book, sort of like Concerning Hobbits in Fellowship of the Ring, but shorter. Let me know what you think. How can I expand on the creation of the Earth by the nature gods?
Earth, our only home, the only planet in the galaxy that maintains life. It all started with the explosive birth of the goddess of the planet. In Her youth, Mother Nature raged as a heaping mass of hot molten gas and rock. Millions of years later, Her molten rage cooled down into a solid planet and formed the oceans that covered Her entire body. From the womb of the oceans, two stars fell from the sky into the waters, forming the souls of the first two beings that started life. Many more years later, land rose from the ocean and life moved from the oceans to form legs and walked on land with their own feet. For millions of years, as the continents broke apart, life evolved more and more from this common ancestor that connects us all into diverse creatures as it grew into the world we know now. From the high snowy mountains to the deep blue seas, to the savannah grasslands to the lush green forests and jungles, life survived and thrived for millions of years. And as such, evolved a new species from the Great African Rift Valley, humans. Since ancient times, humans lived side by side with nature and only took what they needed. They maintained their respect and reverence of the laws of survival Mother Nature bestowed upon the plants and animals on Her body. But as humanity’s intelligence evolved, so did their greed. And that greed became nature’s slow undoing. Humanity plundered and pillaged the lands of its resources and drove many species to extinction, placing themselves above the laws of nature. Overtime, humanity forgot their original connection with nature and saw value only in materials. But as humanity’s grew, so did their awareness. Certain groups of humans learned of the damage they have done to the Earth and seek to fix the planet. But before they can change the world, they must first change themselves. Among those humans have accepted a spiritual power latent within all humans that combines the power of beasts with the intelligence of man. For Mother Nature knew Her most intelligent creations have lost their inherent connection with Her and felt ashamed She ever allowed an intelligent creature to evolve, She granted humanity animal spirits and the power to unleash them through an animal totem, so humanity could recall their connection with the animals they share Her body with. With these totems, humans fight for the future of their one and only home for the next generation to enjoy. Can these humans fix the mistakes of their ancestors? The answer rests in their footprints.

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Chat +447593882116 (Telegram/Whatsapp) to get Todd V - Verbal Game Academy.
Todd Valentine's Verbal Game Academy Course will teach you his top strategies for effective communication.
Todd V is known for the extreme high quality of his content. In Todd V - Verbal Game Academy you will learn how to:
Be the guy that speaks to her emotions
How to walk up with absolute confidence
Make conversation FUN and PLAYFUL
How to ignite her sex drive
GET HER on a deep emotional level
To get Todd V - Verbal Game Academy contact me on:
Reddit Direct Message to u/CourseAccess
Email: silverlakestore/@/yandex.com (remove the brackets)
WhatsApp/Telegram: +447593882116 (Telegram: multistorecourses)

Defending the Draft: 2023 Washington Commanders 8-8-1
Preface:
Hope.
This 2023 season will be the most interesting for the Commanders franchise in a long long time. We enter this season with more uncertainty than I have ever been a part of, however, the one thing the fan base is certain of... is the future is brighter. Dan Snyder purchased the franchise in 1999 and subsequently done nothing but run a blue blood franchise into the ground. This team has lacked direction for a long time and a large part of that was due to Dan Snyder's meddling in the day-to-day football operations of the team. Starting his ownership with signing washed up HOF veterans, to then overspending in free agency (Albert Haynesworth is arguably the worst free agent signing of all time), drug scandal with thetraining staff, the mishandling of the RG3 and Kirk Cousins situation, Not resigning Trent Williams, and lastly we've now reached tumultuous time where his off the field issues have hung a dark cloud over a once proud franchise. Although, lol, his most egregious mistake may be hiring Jim Zorn as head coach. It's egregious that his only punishment is a 6 billion dollar payout for his franchise. I hope the banks bury him and he faces the deserved legal actions. As of now there had been an agreement to sell the franchise to 76'rs and NJ Devils owner, Josh Harris.... and is 20ish members of his parliament. We await to hear news of the reviews from the NFL financial committee to close out the process. Last news I came across was he has cut down the number of minority owners to 20. It will be a pleasure when this agreement is finalized. He could be a terrible owner, but it would still be an upgrade from Synder. Harris, seemingly has been a hands off owner and properly allows the people he's hired to operate the team. This last sports season he's had both of his teams deep in the playoff hunt. This season will be interesting. A lot of questions all around: Sam Howell? Chase Young? Ron Rivera? Eric Bienemy? Josh Harris? I'm not sure of those answers, but I'm very excited to find them out.
Coaching:
HC- Ron Rivera OC- Eric Bieniemy DC- Jack Del Rio
Key Additions: Eric Bieniemy
Ole' Riverboat Ron Rivera is back and going into his 4th season with the Washington Commanders, hopefully his last. I believe Ron Rivera is a leader of men, but I highly question his actual coaching skills and team building. I've currently seen enough of this coaching regime and front office to safely say let's move on. There's been several things that I believed were firable offenses.... the Carson Wentz trade. Some rumors have said that this was a Snyder push. Not entirely positive, but Ron bragged that it was his call. Our team at that point was not a qb away from being really good, let alone a Carson Wentz level of qb. The next fireable offense was starting Wentz over Hienke when the playoffs were on the line. Wentz ended up being benched for Hienke, but it was too little too late. The next fireable offense was not realizing we were eliminated from the playoffs. Going into the last week of the season Ron planned on starting Hieneke. Pretty odd to not know you're out of the playoffs, let alone to test Sam Howell out for next season. Additionally, there's been some pretty questionable roster creation decisions. I absolutely hate the versatile secondary and offensive line philosophy. We currently have a patch work offensive line that has the means to fluctuate between average to below average. Not a single player on the line is top 5 at their respected position. Two years ago we had a top 10 o-line, but that had Brandon Sherff playing like a top 5 guard and Charles Leno having his best season. Our o-line took a significant step back this past season and now looks to be our biggest weakness. Ron has shown to trust his own board and has reached (according to the consensus big board) with every single pick so far. People mistake 2019 as one of his drafts ( Sweat, McLaurin, Holcomb), but he was hired at the end of the season. Take this with a grain of salt as it takes at least 3 years to properly review a draft. Rons 1st round picks have been the following: 2020 pick 2 Chase Young- the correct pick at the time, but hard to botch the 2nd overall pick, 2021 pick 19 Jamin Davis- hated the pick at the time, too early for a linebacker... let a lone a project. On tape he looked lost a lot and made up for it with his elite athleticism. He's shown progress, but nothing showing he's worthy of the pick. 2022 pick 16 Jahan Dotson- looks to be an absolute baller, had him ranked above Olave in the pre-draft process. Was a slight reach above the consensus board, but flashed high end ability. Davis has been the only mistake in the 1st round thus far. When I say mistake I don't necessarily mean player, but the roster building philosophy. Whether reaching on Phidarian Mathis in the 2nd round of 2022. Lol, he was older than Payne coming out of the draft, one year of good production, and was taken a round too early. In the next round Brian Robinson was taken and was really just a body. Haven't really seen anything elite with him so far and was a meh pick. John Bates in the 4th round was egregious. Now I have to give credit where it's due. Kam Curl was an absolute steal and can solidify himself as top 5 safety this season if he continues to play this well. Our other starting safety in Darrick Forest also had a lot of bright spots playing this past season.
Arguably, our best offseason move was signing Eric Bieniemy. I'm absolutely excited. Forget everything about him not calling the plays. Reports from OTA's shows his hands on approach and full control of the offense. One of my favorites things I've heard is he is using OTA's to see what the players can do and crafting the offense to their abilities. Time and time again (Scott Turner) you see coaches say this is the offense and not change anything to match the players strengths. We don't know for sure how the offense will look, but if it's anything close to the motion west coast offense the Chiefs have... boy lessssss gooooooo. Jack Del Rio has been up-and-down in his time in Washington. He's had two very slow starts with the defense to start year, however, they've finished strong and kept his job safe. This is really the no excuse year and everyone needs to show up amd show out.
Free Agency:
Key Departures:
Taylor Hieneke- signed with the Falcons
Cole Holcolm- signed with the Steelers
Bobby McCain- signed with the Giants
Carson Wentz- TBD
J.D. McKissic- TBD
Trai Turner TBD
Andrew Norwell- will be released when he passes a physical
Summary:
In my personal oppinion, the only player that hurt losing in free agency was Cole Holcolm. Linebacker is our one weak spot on defense, however, not resigning Holcolm shows Ron's belief in Jaymin Davis's progression. Cole was limited to 7 games last season and has yet to truly break out. Always played very solid and losing him downgraded the position. We've moved on from both starting guards from last year in Norwell and Turner (previously on the Panthers). Both players were liabilities last season and the guard position was easily upgradeable. Bonny McCain was a solid do it all for is player. Lined up at corner, safety, and nickel throughout the season. Hieneke was a big fan favorite, but was never the answer. We thank you for your service though. Carson Wentz, fuck you. Loved J.D. and his time here, suffered a major injury. Not sure if he gets picked up hy another team.
Key Additions:
Andrew Wiley- 3 years for 24 million, 12 guaranteed. Previously on the Chiefs
Nick Gates- 3 years for 16.5 million, 8 million guaranteed. Previously on the Giants
Jacoby Brissett- 1 year for 8 million, 7.5 million guaranteed. Previously on the Browns
Cody Barton- 1 year for 3.5 million, 3.5 million guaranteed. Previously on the Seahawks
Summary:
Simple. In free agency the Commanders did not overspend and tackled positions of need. None of the players signed are top 5 at their position, however, they could all possibly end up being upgrades to what we have. The most interesting is Andrew Wiley. He allowed 9 sacks (tied for 3rd most)... but man he put on the performance of his life in the superbowl. Another stat that favors him is pass block win-rate, which measure if a lineman can sustain a block for 2.5 seconds. Wylie ranked 9th in that stat last season. I translate that stat to mean can a lineman sustain a block against thr initial rush and counter move off the snap. After that 2.5 seconds the ball is thrown or the play breaks down. Another key factor to this signing is it kicks Samuel Cosmi inside to guard. Cosmi has shown flashes being a high end lineman and I expect him to be even better kicking to guard from right tackle. Guard was our weakest position on the line and Wylie signing helped to upgrade the RG position. Nick Gates is expected to he our starting center. He's coming off of a brutal leg injury that made him consider retirement. Has played guard and center and has some positional flexibility. Jacoby Brissett is the best backup qb in thr league. A solid signing if Howell doesn't pan out. Just a solid game manager that doesn't commit many turnovers. Cody Barton is another unproven guy. Last year was his first year with significant reps. Bobby Wagner leaving in FA and Jordyn Brooks injury made em the guy. He showed flashes of coverage abilities and had a lot of tackles. The tackles weren't necessarily a product of his abilities and more so of cleaning up on a bad run defense team. I've read some notes that he has trouble getting off of blocks. Honestly, haven't watched much on the guy, but reports were he played solid down the stretch.
The Draft:
Round 1 Pick 16: Emmanuel Forbes- CB
Round 2 Pick 47: Jatavius Martin- NCB/S
Round 3 Pick 97: Ricky Stromberg- C/G
Round 4 Pick 118: Braeden Daniels- T/G
Round 5 Pick 137: KJ Henry-DE
Round 6 Pick 193: Chris Rodriguez-RB
Round 7 Pick 223: Andre Jones- DE/LB
Link to all RAS scores for our draft class
https://commanderswire.usatoday.com/lists/2023-nfl-draft-ras-scores-for-the-washington-commanders-7-player-class-emmanuel-forbes/
Round 1:16 Emmanuel Forbes 6'1" 174 lbs. Mississippi St
Stats: 58 targets, 31 catches allowed for 284 yards (23 yards a game), 3 tds allowed/ 6 ints, 9 forced incompletions, 2 dropped ints, 46 tackles.
PFF Grade: 87.2
If being a 160 pounds is your only knock then I think you're doing something alright. The word on the street is he is already up to 174 pounds. You wouldnt realize hes only 174 pounds by the way he plays the run. Hes not scared to hit and flies ro the ball. Although, he does struggle to get off of blocks. Emmanuel Forbes, per PFF, had the highest rating in man coverage last season, albeit the snap count was very miniscule. Emmanuel Forbes is a lanky corner than played a lot of zone coverage and is a very good scheme fit for what we do. I like the pick and I'm not upset about taking him over Gonzalez, who also had his own question marks. Forbes set a NCAA record with 6 pick sixes. A lot of those were the right place at the right time, but when you have that high of a number than you're doing something right.
PFF:
Forbes is one of the best ballhawks in this class. Over the course of his three-year career, he came down with 13 interceptions. That’s four more than the next closest Power Five cornerback since 2020. Forbes was unbelievably dominant in man coverage in 2022, giving up only three catches while also snagging three interceptions. He also only allowed a 20% completion rate in man, the lowest among FBS
PROS
Remarkably lanky frame. Limbs for days — ideal for a corner.Has bounce like a hooper. He can challenge any catch point necessary. Elite ability to locate the football. All six of his interceptions came in man coverage.
CONS
Still a stick. Not much mass on his frame. Has eyes that get him in trouble. Some freelance tendencies on tape.Can get bowled over in the run game. Mediocre tackler over the course of his career.
Round 2: 47 Jartavius "Quan" Martin 5'11". 194 lbs Illinois
Stats: 74 targets, 42 catches allowed, 611 yards allowed, 3 tds allowed, 3 ints, 15 forced incompletions, 2 dropped ints, 4 missed tackles, 64 tackles.
PFF Grade: 73.2
Quan is a beast. I thought he was the 2nd best nickel prospect in the draft and a better deep safety than Brian Branch. Martin absolute rockets around the field in the run game. He started his career at cornerback before transitioning into the safety/nickel position. Another elite athlete that is a perfect fit for our Buffalo Nickel defense.
PFF:
Martin came to Illinois and immediately started as a true freshman in 2018. He originally started off as an outside corner before becoming more of a slot corner recently. He had arguably his best year in 2022, as his 15 forced incompletions were tied for the sixth-most among Power-Five corners. Martin’s 91.0 run-defense grade also led all Power Five cornerbacks. While he played corner at Illinois, we project him more as a safety for the next level.
PROS:
Explosive flat-foot breaks. Tremendous burst. Forceful and reliable tackler - 7 misses on the last 129 attempts last two seasons.Fills like a mac truck in the run game. Wants to come downhill and play in the backfield.
CONS:
Pure man skills are work in progress. Overagressive and liability to bite on fakes. cons On the lighter side for an around the line of scrimmage player. Gets caught with his eyes in the backfield on run
Round 3: 97 Ricky Stromberg 6'3" 306 lbs Arkansas
Stats: 9 impact blocks, 11 qb hurries, 0 qb hits, 0 sacks allowed
PFF Grade: 82.4
Nasty. Another guard experience player that spent his last two years at the center position. Award winner of the Jacob's Blocking Trophy for the SEC'S most outstanding blocker award. This is a solid player that has started since he was freshman in the SEC. He's been battle tested since he was kid and has improved every year. He has some knocks about his play strength, but a NFL program should get em to where he needs to be.
PFF:
Stromberg was a three-star recruit in the 2019 class and started for the Razorbacks as a true freshman, mostly at right guard. He moved inside to center for his sophomore season and spent his final three college seasons there. Stromberg’s 82.4 overall grade and 83.7 run-blocking grade in 2022 both ranked fourth among all centers in college football, and his nine big-time blocks were tied for fifth among FBS centers. Not to mention, Stromberg had an incredible performance at the NFL combine.
PROS:
Does not want to let blocks go. Can see him straining his butt of to stay engaged on tape. Tons of experience against top competition. Four-year starter with 3,121 career snaps.
CONS:
Forward lean gets going on the move, making him liable to topple over. Has wide hands to initiate contact in pass protection before resetting. Leaves himself open for stronger rushers.Unimpressive musculature, which leaves questions about how he'll anchor against NFL strength.
Round 4: Braeden Daniels 6'4" 296 lbs Utah STATS:
0 sacks allowed, 1 qb hit allowed, 14 hurries allowed.
PFF GRADE: 72.2 at tackle, 2021 84.4 at guard.
Braeden Daniels is another tackle/guard hybrid, with starting experience across his college career. This guy is on the lighter side but that allows him to be an Explosive athlete. Very raw at the tackle position and will be a developmental guy. I'd like to give em a try as our swing tackle and see how he performs. He was one of the quickest offensive lineman I've seen off the tape and that athleticism will let him climb to the next level. Even on the lightweight side I'd hate to see this guy running at me on the second level.
PFF:
Daniels is an experienced veteran who commanded the Utes’ offensive line for the past few years. He originally started as a guard before switching over to tackle. His best season came in 2021, as he put up an 84.4 PFF grade. Given his time on the interior, Daniels is at his best when run blocking, and his run-blocking grade in 2021 was an elite 89.1. He still held his own as a pass protector, allowing only five sacks in his Utah career.
PROS
Explodes out of his stance. Arguably the quickest get off in the offensive line class. Linebackers don't want to see him climbing. Gets on them before they can even react. Drive in his lower half to still move the line of scrimmage despite being under 300 pounds.
CONS
Wild into contact. He approaches blocks with the adjustment ability of a freight train. consDoesn't bring his hands with him. Clean engagements are rare on tape. Very light by NFL standards (294 pounds at combine).
Round 5: 137 KJ Henry 6'4" 260 lbs Clemson
STATS:
51 tackles, 3.5 sacks, 1 FF, 6 pass deflections, 50 qb pressures, 31 qb hurries, 14 qb hits.
PFF GRADE: 83.1
Loved this pick. Henry was a 5 star recruit coming out of high-school and decided to attend Clemson University. With Clemson having deep lines it took him a couple of years to get on the field. The stats look odd when you only see 3.5 sacks, however, the 50 qb pressures is the key stat. Seems more like bad luck that the sack numbers weren't high. Clemson's whole d-line underperformed (Bresee, Murphey) and they should have picked up more sacks from Henry who was the best DE on that team last year. The team clearly liked him as we traded back up for him. He's not elite athlete, but he is an elite hands guy. Almost had that veteran presence in college. High motor and will immediately make an impact as a rotational de, a position that sorely needed an upgrade.
PFF:
On a team with Myles Murphy, you can easily make the case that KJ Henry was Clemson's best defensive end this year, as he posted better PFF grades than Murphy in every category and even generated 19 more pressures. The only problem is That Henry is 24 years old while Murphy is only 21. Therefore, Henry was expected to produce this well against younger competition. Nonetheless, this doesn’t mean that he can’t still improve. If Henry's play this season is any indication of his potential, he can still have a great NFL career as an edge defender.
PROS:
Heavy hands that are so well refined. Uses them independently to use combination moves.Utilizes hesitations and head fakes so well to catch linemen off-balance. Coaches rave about the type of teammate he is. He is the type of player you want in the locker room.
CONS:
First step that's unimposing for a rusher on the smaller side. Late bloomer. Wasn't even a starter until this past fall. One of the oldest prospects in the class. Already 24 years old.
Round 6: 193 Chris Rodriguez 6'0" 217 lbs Kentucky
STATS: 8 games played, 175 attempts, 904 rushing yards, 6 tds, 5.2 ypa, 5 catches, 41 rec yards.
PFF GRADE: 90.8
Chris Rodriguez is a PFF darling and was rated as the 7th best running back. This guy's is a pure one cut, run you over, power back. There's not much finesse to his game, but there's highlights of dragging guys 10-yards down the field. He does not posses break away speed, but he will get you 40 yards. He was suspended 4 games due to a dui and he may have been drafted higher on am abysmal Kentucky team. An extra 4 games of stats against SEC competition and no suspension may have jumped him into the 4th round. This was an Eric Bienemy guy and they brought him in because of that. Isiah Pacheco was another EB guy.
PFF:
Rodriguez is a powerful runner, but he lacks the burst and creativity to become anything more than a downhill grinder. He has the size and mentality to do the dirty work between the tackles, but it could be a challenge for him to get to and through the hole quickly in the NFL. He’s a physical blitz protector, so teams might envision a role for him as a second-half battering ram and third-down quarterback protector.
PROS:
Two-time team captain. Thick frame with ability to pick up tough yards. Makes tacklers feel his size at impact. Stays square getting through downhill cuts. Low success rate guaranteed for arm-tacklers. Stays on his feet through heavy angle strikes. Allows lead blockers to do their work. Steps up with force against incoming rushers.
CONS:
Below-average burst getting through line of scrimmage. Lacks finesse to navigate tight run lanes. Change of direction is heavy. One-speed running style is easy to track for linebackers. Pad level is a little tall as run-finisher. Inconsistent finding assignment versus blitz.
Round 7: 233 Andre Jones 6'4" 248 lbs Louisiana
STATS: 7 sacks, 5 qb hits, 20 hurries.
PFF GRADE: 77.2
Andre Jones was another hybrid de/lb player coming out last year. He possess 34 1/4" arms which is an elite number for his size. May move to LB, but I'm not sure that's the right move with a 4.71 40-yard dash. He doesn't have much a pass rush move set playing a hybrid role, but does use length to his advantage. A solid developmental pick.
PROS:
Shows a natural feel for setting up blockers and getting them off-balance. His hands are active and violent, and Jones quickly disengages with blockers and counters when his initial move stalls. Possesses accurate snap anticipation and timing to beat blockers off the edge. Offers some versatility, rushing from a two-and three-point stance with the playing speed to stand up in space.Flashes strength as a bull rusher and his energy doesn't plateau. Showed initial quickness and good flexibility to dip and bend. Jones has active hands and suddenness to his movements, demonstrating the ability to counter inside. Has fluid footwork to redirect, reverse momentum and close with a burst. Regularly first off the ball with good snap anticipation. He’s a high-effort pass rusher with an impressive combination of length and speed.
CONS:
Jones has to develop a counter move or two in the pass rush, and Jones needs to make better use of his hands. He lacks the speed of a chase and- tackle guy. He lacks twitch as a pass rusher and lacks the feet and flexibility to threaten around the edge. Jones also shows some stiffness when trying to bend the edge, often getting pushed past the pocket — he seems more comfortable countering back inside.
Draft Summary:
This was my favorite Ron Rivera/Martin Mayhew draft thus far. Going into the draft, offensive line, cornerback, and quarterback were our three biggest needs. Drafting in the middle of the round really took us out of the olineman race. The last one that interested me was Broderick Jones and he went off the board when the Steelers traded up. At that point in the draft it really left us with going cornerback. The Forbes pick was received negatively due to Christian Gonzalez being available. Both players will be viewed under the microscope throughout their careers. I'm fine with Forbes pick though. Another lanky cornerback who was an elite athlete. I did have Gonzalez rated higher going into the draft, but he slid for a reason. A lot of his tape shows him not necessarily being an elite cornerback, but being an elite athlete that plays corner. Forbes actually showed the athleticism, corner skills, and ballhawking ability. Some additional knocks against Gonazalez and his love of the game. Quan Martin was our biggest surprise pick of the draft. A lot of people had him going in the 3rd round, but I think the 2nd was a fine spot. Mayhew after the draft said he wish we were more aggressive at times, which I translated as not getting Brian Branch that went several picks before us. I think Quan was the backup option, but I like him as much as Branch. I think Quan will be a better deep safety and Bramch will be a better nickel. Liked Quan alot, but felt we should have gone o-line at this pick. Ocyrus Torrence would've been a sweet pick here. I think if that happened, the consensus view on our draft would shoot up. Quan will immediately via for playing time as our base defense is essentially a 4-2-5. Kendall Fuller was our only above average corner and now we turned our secondary into a strength. Ricky Stromberg and Braeden Daniels were our next two picks. I like Stromberg’s tape a lot and think by next he will be a solid starter at guard or center. Braeden Daniels will be a nice depth piece and if he's able to tame his play he could develop into a starter. Fun player to watch. KJ Henry was an awesome pick and can see him being a nice rotational piece. Good pick at an underrated area of need on our defense. RB wasn't a pressing need, but it's an underrated area of weakness. I think Brian Robinson is about as average of rb as you will see starting in the NFL. I wouldn't be surprised if Rodriguez slowly cut into Robinson's role over the next two years. Antonio Gibson has had some solid season, but has a severe fumbling problem. Andre Jones will be a depth piece that will need development moving forward.
Offseason summary:
The biggest question of our offseason was our owner, which now appears resolved. Our second biggest question... was who was our starting qb? Sam Howell. Ron preached all offseason that he was going with Howell and I'll be damned, he did. Brissett was good qb to bring in, not someone that would necessarily turn the offseason into a battle, but can be a starter if called upon. Really a true backup qb. I'm all in on the Sam Howell train. I love it for a multitude of reasons. One, he balls out and we have our qb of the future, two he plays well enough we give him another season and maybe Ron is out and we get a high draft pick, three he bombs and we fire Ron Rivera and go for Caleb Williams next season. If anything, it gives us a direction for our future. I'm ready for Ron to go and think he's only as good as his coordinators. I'm concerned that EB AND Howell turn the offense around Ron gets resigned and EB takes a head coaching role... then the offense regressed. Additionally, I don't want Ron to get credit for drafting Howell. It was 5th round pick, you and every team passed on him for 4 rounds. If Howell is that good... it's not because Ron was a genius and drafted him. Very similar to Seattle taking Russel. I am excited about EB being here and think he's the real deal. I will give Ron credit for allowing him to run his own offense as he sees fit. OTA's have shown that EB is pushing his guys hard and is trying to see what he can do with the offense. We really do have elite playmaker and I'm most excited to see what he can do with Antonio Gibson. I can see his role being that of Jerrick McKinnon, with more athleticism. Sam Howell has shown a lot of progress since his rookie season. Had issues with his foot work, but has shown vast improvements. We only have 1 preseason game and 1 NFL game of tape on him. I liked what he showed. When watching tape you could see him going through his progression, man absolutely saved the day wish his escapability- was under pressure the whole game, threw two beautiful deep passes, and won the game. He did throw one bad pick, but was under pressure and playing hero ball. He had one week of practice with the starters, now he has a whole offseason. Our defense should be a top 5 unit next season and we only got better. Chase Young should be fully healthy and he's the X-factor for the number one overall defense. He comes out plays to his full potential then he could be a mid teens sack guy. If we have that sort of production and Sam Howell plays well than we can compete for the decision. Big if though. Our secondary really lacked a 2nd option, Benjamin St Juyce has shown some flashes but didn't seeze the role last year. Now on paper he's the number and that's very solid. We return two top 6 defensive tackles and Montez Swear is one of the most underrated players in the league. He's yet to have a high sack season, but is very much that Jadaveon Ckowney type of player in the run game. Big question mark season for Jaymin Davis. We knew he needed development, but it's been slower than previously thought. Down the stretch he showed flashes that he was coming into his own and now is his year. He's one of the best athletes at linebacker in the league and his ceiling is very very high. Overall I predict we will go 10-7 and challenge for a wild card spot. That record can fluctuate each one, but I'm calling the improvement now. We went 8-8-1 with bottom 3 qb play. The defense got better, we hired a better offensive coordinator, Howell will at the minimum be slightly better than Hienke last season, we didn't lose any major pieces and had a solid all around draft. I'm truly excited to watch how our future plays out.

Session 5 - Prison Break!
https://imgur.com/a/Hx3xpGr

The setup: the party had just managed to skirt a brewing riot in front of the city stockades and were now prepping to go into their first actual dungeon. I pulled in a few NPCs for some RP and dialogue in the upper chamber and the party had successfully escorted their quarry from Northshire to the prison. The party didn't pick up on the "most crimes are now a death sentence, especially defias affiliation" and listened to Padfoot's request to be taken to prison rather than killed on the spot. He definitely knew the prison break was imminent.

The session: So the party gets to the warden, an old, half-blind octegenarian that was conscripted to guard the prison alongside adolescents and pre-teens. One of the kids was trying to scold a prisoner for fashioning a defias mask out of the few blankets available to them, and was shanked for it, sparking the prison break. Outside, the townspeople caught wind of the murder and wanted to confront the warden directly about sending kids down to certain death.
The rogue hands over the bounty papers Dughan provided on the way to Northshire, but also takes a second to forge an extra crayoned-on zero to the bounty reward. So 500 becomes 5000 gold, the warden shrugs and accepts it because he's old and why not, the party is ecstatic. I make a note.

The Stockades: I'd built this before we'd acquired any actual terrain (beyond the river setting my WH40k player provided), and I'd had K'Nex from my childhood unearthed from the back of a closet since my wife and I had just bought a new house. The K'Nex being what they are meant that measuring things out and scaling it to what appears in game was remarkably smooth. I'd created a number of side rooms and accounted for roughly 5 enemies in each cell, and I'd roll a d4 to determine how many rounds it would be before a not-yet-cleared cell would send another wave at my party. Came out to be about 90 bandits possible, depending on how my party advanced.

Since this was earliest in my campaign writing, I hadn't yet thought of any mechanical fun to have except bog standard melee nonsense and the occasional cultist or madman. This is where I figure I have to spice things up going forward.
A problem I should've expected: My players picked up on the layout pretty quick and stood back at the entry hallway to create a bottleneck so that every new wave of enemies would have to go through that intersection, and the ranged PC's would just turn that square into an absolute meat grinder.
As they cleared the initial cells, I put a twilight cultist barricaded in one of the front ones that was preaching on a soapbox about the end times. He was a madman but had a small following gathered to hear him out, and eventually fight on his behalf. They snagged Val (mage) and swarmed him in melee in a cramped cell, a few followers blocking the small entrance and not allowing support to get in. Val's got a 1-per-short-rest wing buffet that will let him shift a few squares with his dragon wings, and some clutch use of frost nova let him get the upper hand.
Outside the cell, Xalatath woke up on Baldris' (Druid) belt. A failed Wisdom save later and he assured the party he'd cover Val and the rest should move deeper into the prison, and that he heard the cries of a trapped guard just out of view (this was corroborated by a low DC group perception check).
This worked twofold because Orfiz (rogue) couldn't make the session because of a Covid scare and couldn't dedicate time to participate online beyond just observing over a makeshift discord stream. After talking with both players before the session, we agreed Baldris would use this opportunity to knock Orfiz out and lock him in the first cleared cell. Orfiz told the party he was going to check for loot, and then clunk.
I put the bosses at the extreme ends of each branching hallway- Targorr The Dread, a large Orc barbarian beating up on a guard and a defias prisoner, to the west. Kam Deepfury, a Dark Iron dwarf still in his cell, to the east, and Bazil Thredd, the defias lieutenant, to the north.
Dorgon made it to the intersection and heard an orc grunt down the west hallway and just charged in solo. Ferren went to eavesdrop on a defias thug berating Kam. Val and Baldris were treating the beaten guards, Bazil intimidated them and caused them to run in and engage in combat. So all 3 bosses were pulled in a round.
I had a trap fashioned out of a hanging-light-thing in front of Bazil's cell, yknow like the old wooden chandeliers in dungeons and castles, that Bazil cut the rope on as a guard approached and knocked them down headfirst at his feet. Bazil used this opportunity to threaten to kill the guard if the players tried to stop the escape. The other rescued guard was searching a cell and found a healing potion (if a player had it, healing pot; if the guard had it, toilet water). The guard drank it and couldn't help in the fight because he was busy puking.
Dorgon going one on one with the orc meant he had to pull out all of the stops when it came to damage mitigation and the little self healing he had at the time. With heroic strike rerolls and stoneform and dull pain, it played out like the Saving Private Ryan knife scene.
Ferren overhears the defias telling Kam that he did his part and needs to commit further to the cause, and Kam just wasn't having it. Ferren killed the defias and approached Kam, who blew him off, and after one attempt of RP he basically gave the dwarf the finger and turned back to support the others fighting their own bosses. Kam's cell wasn't locked, and he took offense, so he followed Ferren back to the main intersection and started blasting away with a mysteriously acquired blunderbuss. The party was using crates around the hallways as cover, but didn't think to look in them or question how the bandits were armed with short bows and other non-shank weapons. Baldris was going boomkin to assist with Targorr and Bazil in the intersection but when Kam entered the fray he swapped to bear and kept the dark iron busy.
The guard's throat is cut, and Val goes loud with every high level spell slot he had left. Dorgon finishes up Targorr and charges back to the center intersection, catching eyes with Kam. Dorgon's player is a classic vet so he knew the relation between dwarven clans, and throws out a dwarven slur he intended to be one of those words you can only say the first letter of. I didn't make him roll, because I was laughing too hard, and I said "yep, you've got his attention now and even though he has a bear jaw latched on his arm he REALLY hates you, Dorgon".
The party mops up the bosses, and I don't dick around with them clearing out minions from every cell since they were just supposed to be fodder until the bosses anyhow. Targorr had a map to some place in the mountains where orcs were gathering called "ragefire chasm", and after rolling on a random loot table, Ferren got a disguise kit. That comes up later.
Orfiz is liberated by the party figuring he just got jumped by a wayward prisoner, Baldris chooses not to divulge what happened.
The party re-emerges from the stockades and is awarded their bounty. They question the girl who was throwing produce at Dorgon and Orfiz questions Padfoot. The session ends here, and Orfiz comes by my place during the off-week to have a solo session.
Been crazy busy with work and the holiday so I'll knock out the next few sessions with more mechanics and stuff in the next few days. Thanks for hanging around so far!
END OF SESSION 5
Up Next: Session 5.5 - Orfiz, Noir Private Eye

I know quitting your job as a cook usually simply comes with two weeks notice or a ragequit walkout, but for eleven months I worked at a new franchise that had such potential which was being squandered by the incompetence of upper management. I present the nearly 6000 word thesis I turned in on my last day. Locations and names have been changed to cartoon references. Brackets represent ambiguous information in place of specific details.
Krusty Krab Careers Jobs
Opening in [Month/Year], Krusty Krab (KK) Bikini Bottom is on its 4th kitchen manager in less than a year. Krusty Krab O-Town has recently let go its inaugural kitchen manager and sous chef. Almost no member of the Bikini Bottom opening management team remains employed by KK. There is a pattern developing where one must question both the choice of employee and the directive given to new franchises. These lingering issues I brought concerns about in the first weeks of opening but was disregarded at every turn despite my experience with festival traffic. As a result I decided this was not a place I wanted to advance, but with a good-enough paycheck I’d be a lowly grunt in the kitchen four days a week, at five days a week I would have quit or been fired over a public outburst long ago. If Krusty Krab alters course slightly while being true to the brand this could be a successful chain.
My unique employment history in brick and mortar restaurants, food trucks, pop up culinary concepts, trade shows/conventions, and the film industry make me an ideal candidate to be on the opening team for new KK locations. My outgoing nature and foresight are valuable assets. For example, on training week before opening when I was standing around idly without a task I took it upon myself to organize the disarray that was dry storage. Overhearing Krabs tell another manager where he wanted the cleaning products placed, I had a jumping off point and the organization I created nine months ago is still largely in place. Since returning from my vacation in early February I have made it my mission to keep the storage area organized because it was again starting to resemble a hoarder’s house rather than a commercial kitchen. This is now part of my weekly routines because every time I turn my back there is more product being placed haphazardly just anywhere with little regard. I also recently reorganized the walk-in cooler because of problematic stocking with items being placed on the same shelf or below raw proteins. I also simply put all the like products together such as cheeses or fruits that were scattered amongst several shelves. With recent overordering I cannot keep up with the organization of the walk in cooler. The pattern recognition of food types and even simple shapes appears to be lost on the Bikini Bottom crew. My daily reorganization of containers is proof of this. Most days I’ll take a few minutes to put all cylinders together, all cambros together in descending volume, all deep and shallow pans next to each other rather than intermixed. My decision to be a kitchen manager at age 19 from 2005 thru 2008 and rarely enter restaurant management since is very calculated.
With my prior knowledge of professional kitchens I was becoming Bikini Bottom’s resident nag to coworkers as I made note of health department violations on a daily basis. I stopped after being largely ignored for two weeks. My regular health department nags include; a battle with jackets and hats being placed only in the designated area (a designated area that did not exist until I created a place for personal items a in January by neatly organizing the dry storage area again), waiting until prepped items are cooled before a cover is placed on top, placement of raw seafood, open containers (very often sugar, flour, and pancake mix bags ripped open and left), and dirty dishes/containers placed back in rotation. The dirty dishes and containers in rotation with the clean ones are at an atrociously high number. I have given up on making the 4th fryer seafood allergy safe too. With the low volume of seafood allergy safe items Bikini Bottom should purchase smaller baskets to visually discourage cross contamination with the other fryers and baskets. My skills to organize the kitchen do not end with simply where to store products to meet minimal health department standards.
Half of the space in the Bikini Bottom kitchen is completely wasted on an ill-advised walkway to the dishpit. An intelligent design would place a second doorway directly to the dishpit connected to the bar or where the bathrooms reside. Numerous times during the opening week of KK Bikini Bottom I said, yelled, sang, and muttered that we have too many food items for the amount of space we have. Icus stated that there was more space than Bluffington. Is Bluffington intelligently designed? Because Bikini Bottom most certainly isn’t. So Bikini Bottom actually has less space even if there is more square footage. See the attached diagram for an intelligent design that could potentially house a menu of this size. Bikini Bottom forces a line design on this kitchen when an open concept is needed for this menu. It’s as if this floorplan was created by a person who had only ever seen one commercial kitchen previously and couldn’t think 4th dimensionally to understand the needs of the workers to smoothly serve customers.
There is not enough counter space for pizzas without getting off the line, the microwave is placed completely out of the way, the freezer’s curved design is a waste of potential counter space and a falling hazard for containers stored on top of it, the toaster is an overcomplicated and overexpensive piece of machinery that serves exactly one purpose when a flat top could be used to toast bread and other purposes like a quesadilla special, sautee was designed without an overhang for spices, the pantry station lacks the counter space to have two containers of flour and two containers of batter for seafood allergies, there are no Frialator fryers which I have worked with at every single kitchen job previously instead we got the cheap Vulcan model (is that logical), the cheap low boy in pantry that doesn’t drain excess water anywhere it’s just supposed to evaporate somehow but doesn’t, the grill and fryer should be placed next to each other (with a higher volume of crossover than other stations), the floors are flat instead on having a mild decline towards the drains (just look at the standing water residing behind the oven right now), in the dishpit the spraying area and the filled sinks are backwards of a logical dipshit, the ramp to the back door is on the wrong side, there is no refrigerated place downstairs to stage extra food for busy shifts (the beer cooler is once again used for such food items because of this massive oversight), the prep station is an afterthought and miniscule, the dishes on the line are difficult to grab for anyone under 5’11” and inaccessible for anyone under 5’6” (instead of putting them underneath tables that also give that desperately needed counterspace I spoke of), there is not enough space to store to-go containers or boats behind the line, expo is lacking a low boy for the numerous items that are supposed to be cold but are instead kept at room temperature all day long, no one in management thought about buying shelves until right before Bikini Bottom opened as a result the clean full sheets sat on the floor for days, we had only the exact amount of 1⁄6 pans for an absurd amount of time making it impossible to rotate and clean them when necessary (which is daily), we still struggle with 1/9 pan supply. And just when I thought I documented all the poor design choices possible I stumbled upon a person whose office holiday party was booked at KK Bikini Bottom. The deck space works just fine as a deck. It does not double well as a gathering space. The space is too long and narrow for parties, it promotes little splitoff groups rather than a coming together of a larger gathering. It may be advantageous to contact a social psychologist for help designing a private party space that promotes intermingling rather than enforcing small pockets to form. The reorganization of the physical kitchen isn’t all that screams for an overhaul.
There are six positions on the line at the Krusty Krab; expo, oven, grill, sautee, fryer, and pantry. But the pantry and fryer positions are forced together like a bad remix. Everyone who mainly works pantry deserves a $6 raise immediately because it is a station and a half. Both Icus and Krumm, while kitchen manager, kind of acknowledged the pantry is too big for one station without outright mentioning the lopsided distribution of work. I imagine in the only location where this works, Bluffington, a second person joins the pantry at noon because of the unreasonable amount of items one person is tasked with. Bikini Bottom only has one person in this position at all times, maybe modify it for one person? The excess of items on the pantry position largely resembles a position I would call “set-up” or “build” at a previous job that made sensible choices. This build position should have tostadas, tacos, butcher’s blocks, toast, salads, lettuce wrap set ups, and preparing plating for whichever station is most bogged down. I have absolutely lost my mind yelling about salads at least once a month, ranting that they do not belong on the fryer position because of how illogical it is that five salads are included on the mountain of other items the pantry has. I have always considered working in a kitchen a kind of dance, and the pantry station demands an unnecessarily convoluted dance to keep up with the demand. Without the salads, tostadas, and tacos the station is already the busiest. Do we really need to combine ballet and swing by including these extra awkward dance steps in this single station? For a kitchen designed this poorly I suppose it is. Again, see attached document for an intelligently designed kitchen that might be able to accommodate this menu. Unless Bikini Bottom is going to close for a month to fix the baffling floor plan design the menu is shouting to be reduced to 30-36 items.
The menu is too big. Krusty Krab is the jack of all foods, master of none. In general I believe individual locations should be allowed 18% omissions, and 18% unique items to this wildly unwieldy menu sitting around 50 food items including sides. The insistence on keeping menu items that don’t sell at Bikini Bottom because of Bluffington is mind boggling. Chicken tenders do not sell at Bikini Bottom. fried sushi does not sell at Bikini Bottom, not enough to justify their place on the line. I don’t care how well these items work in Bluffinton. They. Do. Not. Work. At. Bikini. Bottom. If the KK location in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean sells an incredible amount of live krill does that mean Bikini Bottom and O-Town must sell live krill too? Take the fried sushi off the menu. I had a complete meltdown about this during a Dimmadome service and my valid point was met with indifference. Replace the kid’s tenders with a kid’s fish sticks. We already have the tilapia fish sticks on the line for tacos. Or make the kid’s fish sticks cod. We cut cod to order for fish tacos in spite of health code violations because it is too rare of an order to make beforehand. Saffron in mashed potatoes? If you must. Why are green tomatoes only on the menu during lunch? Bikini Bottom throws away a sizable amount of spoiled green tomatoes each week. Have green tomatoes on the menu all day long or don’t have them at all. The smoked salmon could go on salads or a special taco to justify its place on the line. The corn pico’s place on the line is unjustified. It only goes on one item, tostadas, which are not particularly popular. If we had a taco salad we could throw the corn pico on there. We also have unreasonable waste from unusable taco shells, smash up those imperfect taco shells and throw them on said taco salad. But before we add salads, let's get rid of the pear and kale salads. The pears' position on the line are unjustified, if we threw them on a taco variation maybe their place on the Bikini Bottom line could be argued but for now they only go on a salad that isn’t particularly popular. The kale salad is an issue of space for a 4th green for salads is too much. The krusty salad is my most hated house salad of all time. And it comes down to the toast with goat cheese. This ancillary step of spreading goat cheese on a cracker is an unnecessary step for an overly complicated dance and should be part of the expo dance if expo wasn’t a shoddily designed afterthought lacking a low boy.
There are a plethora of squeeze bottles on the pantry station that have no place on the overloaded station. They belong to an expo station with a low boy to keep them cold. Pantry has an overwhelming ten squeeze bottles: chipotle crema, sweet chili vinaigrette, buffalo, korean bbq, ranch, caesar, wine vinaigrette, lemon vinaigrette, honey mustard, and lemon aioli. Only the first four are justified on an intelligently designed fryer section, the second four belong on the build station, the last two have no place anywhere but expo. With this extra space sautee could keep their bottles and two purees cold in the fryer's lowboy instead of leaving them at room temperature all day inviting a pathogen party. This theorized intelligently designed expo would have room to keep these four squeeze bottles and a double of every sauce chilled to pour them into ramekins, a move that is highly common in the expo dance. The fact that expo doesn’t have a double of all squeeze bottles is foolish. Expo has to bother an overloaded station to pour these side sauces instead.
How many gallons of basil aioli has Bikini Bottom thrown away in 11 months? Four aiolis in general is way too many and most go on a single item; basil aioli on the incredibly unpopular veggie burger, lemon aioli for calamari, sweet chili aioli for the BLT that is only served half of the day, and garlic aioli actually goes on two items…I believe. What a colossal waste of precious little space, lose two aiolis and then you can sing the logical song with me. Perhaps we can put garlic aioli and sweet chili vinaigrette on the BLT separately and accomplish the exact same thing the sweet chili aioli does. The wings too have unneeded complications. Having worked at a sports bar specializing in wings for the better part of a decade I find KK’s plating of wings to be overly pretentious. The carrots, celery, and blue cheese have lost function. Heffer Wolf always said no one eats the carrot/celery julienne with blue cheese. It’s a complete waste of all the ingredients because you’ve gone too far with the presentation. Wings aren’t fancy. Wings are supposed to have a small pool of sauce and be sloppy. It’s like a sloppy joe that’s not sloppy, an unsloppy joe is a failure to sloppy joes just as the KK presentation of wings is a disparagement to the dish. Ever since training week back in 2022 I have used a scale to give Bikini Bottom a passing or failing grade.
Chokey Chicken to Chum Bucket is the scale I use to judge efficiency and sanity at Bikini Bottom. Both establishments are upscale casual dining experiences in Capitol City in the same vein as KK. Chokey had high employee retention and relatively smooth openings for new locations. Chum Bucket’s employee turnover was high and every location opening was chaotic. Which one sounds closer to KK? Chokey Chicken was filled with chefs I respect including Chef Ren Hoek who remains a close friend to this day. Ren lost his lifelong passion for kitchen work after working management at Chum Bucket. He’s actually seeking work in Bikini Bottom. Call him up at [phone number], but KK will give him Nam’ flashbacks of why he chose driving for a living rather than cooking for five years. The pair of us together helming Bikini Bottom with the ability to omit and create 18% of the overloaded menu can bring success to this franchise. We have worked well numerous times in the past on various concepts in the past including creating The Attack of the Pickled Tomatoes Burger for [Promotional live performance of a TV show] at the Capitol City Theater. We served 100 people in 60 at the [sitcom filming] lunch. That’s physically impossible but somehow we did it quite a few times.
A fun anecdote about Ren Hoek’s KK experience from the soft launch; on training week numerous times I brought concerns about being seafood allergy safe that were dismissed. As mentioned earlier the pantry station lacks the counter space to have two containers of flour and two containers of batter, one each of which seafood never touches. Before the soft launch Chef Stimpy from Bluffington insisted all customers just kind of know everything is prone to be seafood contaminated. Well, chef Ren was a customer that night and this absolutely was not communicated to customers. He claimed to have a slight seafood allergy and was not informed of what the crab soup was. In reality he does not have a seafood allergy. I didn’t discuss the seafood issue with Ren, separately we noticed egregious violations of food safety standards and we each responded in our own way. The soft launch service was so awful that night Chef Ren walked out of a free meal to pay for some ramen, never to return to Bikini Bottom. I attribute this oversight, and many of Bikini Bottom’s (and probably O-Town’s) problems to hubris over the Bluffington location.
Chef Chokey would also be hesitant to join the KK team. It will cost a finder’s fee just for me to reveal Chef Chokey’s name. Chef Chokey was a lead in the rapid expansion of Chokey Chicken restaurants. He opened numerous restaurants and was big on the philosophy that each restaurant must have its own personality in order to fit the unique local culture and the variety of working spaces. This is in direct conflict with the KK way that everything must be exactly like the Bluffington location no matter what. There was only one Chokey Chicken location that had the full menu, Chokey Springfield. Chokey Springfield had a large space which was intelligently designed to accommodate such a large menu. The KK menu is all over the place, closing in on 50 menu items which comes up as a failure on the Chokey Chicken/Chum Bucket scale. This is not the only area KK comes up as a major failure on the Chokey Chicken/Chum Bucket scale.
Has anyone in this company ever worked festival traffic before? Does anyone have the experience of working next to a major venue with 8000 seats before this one? The way Bikini Bottom handles Dimmadome services it certainly appears that the decision-makers fall on the wrong side of the Dunning-Kruger effect. Having all 50 items available during such massive traffic is completely asinine. An unwillingness to serve a partial menu is hindering the Bikini Bottom kitchen staff. I have worked festival traffic before, and Dimmadome events bring in festival traffic. I’ve worked inside a festival whose line never ended but every customer got their order in 5 minutes or less because the line kept flowing with only four items on the menu as that’s what was warranted at the B-Sharps Music Festival. I refuse to be set up for failure the way Bikini Bottom sets up Dimmadome services for failure. The entire week of concerts in [summer] 2022 I was set up for failure every day (it was after this I modified my availability to keep my sanity and my paycheck). When I brought my concerns about running efficiently during Dimmadome services I was labeled a B-worker for the first time in my employment history by Icus and Krabs. It is that moment which I was either going to holler at them both for being 2-dimensional thinkers who were obviously unqualified for the positions they accepted in this company, or just put my head down. If Bikini Bottom has a successful concert day service, hail your team because they snatched victory from the jaws of defeat. They swam with concrete shoes. I often wonder how many customers had bad experiences and never returned after concert days. A Dimmadome service should have no more than 25 items and have one or two specials to divert traffic towards an area the kitchen can keep moving. An Open Cup Open Plate (OCOP) special for foot traffic is absolutely needed. When I suggested OCOP special, Heffer was intrigued by this idea and immediately named burgers as the special to keep foot traffic flowing. Smithers wouldn’t hear this idea, babbling on about what’s advertised instead of hearing out a sound idea. This prattle despite radio commercials having inaccurate hours and social media promoting Bikini Bottom’s steak tacos to this day. I always found Smithers to be a better fit as a middle management office pencil pusher than as a hands-on restaurant manager. Overall I find KK managers are selected to be automatons not to question their orders rather than critical thinkers who could take the restaurant to the next level. During brunch service is another period of time that must be modified to lessen the heft of items. Having a full menu that barely works plus brunch is so deep into Chum Bucket territory, in my opinion we now have to use the Tropic Thunder scale of full [R-word censored by jobs] to describe a 60-plus-item brunch. Chef Ren hired back a Chum Bucket cook who had a mental breakdown and stormed out during brunch (plus full menu) service because Ren knew the employee was justified and upper management was completely unreasonable in their brunch requests. It’s not just questionable decisions that hinder KK staff but improper equipment as well.
This is the first restaurant I have worked at which uses a touch screen on the line rather than tickets. From day one I found this to be technology for technology’s sake inferior to tickets. Chef Ren forced a new Chum Bucket location to rip out touch screens from the line and bring in ticket printers because of the higher efficiency. The touch screen is a great idea for expo, not the entire line. My biggest gripe is that each station does not get all the information. Early on I was regularly yelled at for not staggering my items, well I can’t see the rest of the order; a problem I have never had with a ticket system. Touchscreen software is also much more prone to errors and glitches. When I reported an error during a heavy service Icus and Krabs blamed my skills on the line without looking into the malfunctioning screen further. It was glitchy for weeks before the two finally investigated and corrected the issue I brought to their attention long before. Those two gave me an immense amount of ammunition to dislike them in the opening weeks until I stopped caring. The issue I had with being unable to scroll beyond the bottom of a completely filled screen has returned and is still there as of [my last day]. There are also important details that get buried. A frequent meltdown I have is that sauce on side requests and other important modifications are not capitalized or in red to catch the eye as they have been at jobs with tickets. These details get lost on Bikini Bottom’s touchscreens. A sauce on side salad made by me will be wrong 50% of the time because of the instructions being camouflaged in a word salad. This goes for coleslaw on the side and drizzle on the side too. Drizzle in general I dislike because of the pretentiousness, but whatever, drizzle it on top rather than putting it in a ramekin if you must. There are numerous places where Bikini Bottom overcomplicates matters for reasons I cannot ascertain.
Why is there such a large variety of plates? Why do we have a medium circular plate for salads and a large bowl for salads with protein? This just confuses the simplest of matters. I was told this is done because of the high price hike with protein, a larger presentation was desired. But that price hike is the price of protein in 2023. Bikini Bottom should put all salads in the large bowls and use all the circular salad plates in a skeet shooting promotion. I understand why we have both a circular platter plate and a pizza plate but in my restaurant the circular platter plates must go...or maybe the large platter plate instead. Is the large platter used for anything besides fish and chips? That extra space on fish and chips plates are only used for side sauces which can easily be delivered to customers on small circular plates. What is the medium oval plate doing that the medium rectangular plate isn’t? And vice versa. Why do they both exist when they are approximately the same size? Let me write an internet commercial where we break a lot of plates so we can get some logical use out of the superfluous plates. I don’t care which one is destroyed, the ovals or the rectangles but one of them is an unnecessary redundancy in excess done again. Speaking of commercials, the unimaginative radio advertisements for Bikini Bottom are doing little to lure new customers to the restaurant.
The three radio spots I have heard on KBBL all sound like they were produced by a marketing 101 student who wasn’t a natural in the field. The voiceover actor was so uncharismatic I was certain someone from the office was chosen at random to read the copy. Then I heard that same voiceover actor selling pool supplies on another radio station so I concluded that Bikini Bottom must have hired the cheapest guy in town to produce the most basic of commercials. Perhaps there is someone else you could hire more qualified to voiceover these commercials, an actor with experience on an Emmy award winning cable program whose unique place in the film industry was written about on [website] would be a much wiser choice to be the voice of the KK? (See external link). In the ad there was no catchphrase, no jingle, no music whatsoever. This simple approach to commercials lacks the pizazz to catch the attention of radio listeners. The first two commercials I heard would get a C in marketing 101 as they were nearly the exact same and accomplished the bare minimum to sell wares, the third one would maybe get a B- because there was some sort of attempted gimmick with the voiceover whispering to represent thinking inside his head about what he was going to eat later at KK. Not only does this commercial give no reason for the man to think inside his head, the outside world still and unpopulated. To see what a creative person would do with this concept see the attached script. There is an attempted slogan that could become part of an ad campaign. Commercials aren’t the only lost opportunities in promotions.
There are numerous promotional celebrity tie-ins at Bikini Bottom’s fingertips with Dimmadome performers. The restaurant could have a Phish sandwich as a OCOP special on [Phish performance dates], or a pretentious Jelly Roll on [Jelly Roll performance date]. Has anyone reached out to the Dimmadome theater or talent management for approved special menu items to be promoted inside the dome? Perhaps a special 20% discount to ticket holders? Is Bikini Bottom capable of getting permits to extend Open Container hours beyond [cutoff time] for an afterparty or block party throughout a Dimmadome concert? I see additional marketing opportunities left on the table for all new locations.
I believe new KK locations are missing out on a marketing campaign by opening with the entire cumbersome 50 item menu. This is a staggering amount of menu items which is too much to ask new staffers to perfect all at once. After a few months expanding the menu by approximately ten items is catching to customers who haven’t returned after a single visit or infrequently stop into KK. There are ten new food items that might appeal to them. Just like it appears KK doesn’t know what it’s looking for in a good commercial spot, this company doesn’t appear to recognize a talented from an untalented worker until it’s too late.
It is my understanding that KK had a headhunter to find Icus, the first Bikini Bottom kitchen manager. If it were up to me I’d hire someone to break the legs of that headhunter for bringing in a subpar kitchen lead. We are still attempting to recover from the lousy choices she made in the floor plan. If anybody responsible for Bikini Bottom’s floor plan is still giving input, stop them immediately. Once the doors were open to the public Icus had his head in the clouds to a point where I questioned if he saw the writing on the walls of an imminent demotion and stopped trying as a result. I had a full deck of 3x5 cards in an archaic powerpoint presentation bringing numerous concerns to light that he kept putting off listening to until he was fired. Those same cards were broken out for this essay. The second kitchen manager, Krumm, is a good lesson in honesty. According to Heffer, Krumm was given a bill of goods about how smoothly KK Bikini Bottom was running. Since Krumm stepped into a latrine pit which he was led to believe was a heated pool, he left in short time. Krumm also had plans to modify the menu but when his bosses told him to be a rodeo clown rather than a cowboy Krumm didn’t take too kindly to that. Meanwhile Heffer was the savior of the Bikini Bottom kitchen. I didn’t agree with every single decision he made, but I did with a majority of them. Heffer’s overhaul was such a blessing so I didn’t have to fiddle with the organization of 60% of the equipment anymore, only about 20% now. Too bad Heffer’s crippling depression came back after bashing his head into the wall out of frustration with the shackles KK restrained him with.
The current management team is enthusiastic but inexperienced. I see an accumulation of small infractions that might bring down Bikini Bottom’s health department rating significantly. I see the entire management team being inattentive or unaware about organizational issues. Whatever bureaucratic nonsense corporate tasks everyone with from the original sous chef Skeeter to Patty Mayonnaise that makes them walk away from the line between 11am and 1pm especially is infuriating. I have never been left alone on a multi-person line during peak hours so regularly, and I won’t tolerate it anymore. As much as I believe in his drive, I imagine our current kitchen manager SpongeBob will be let go after a disastrous service during the Dimmadome concert season that someone has to take the fall for. Chef Ren and I could help bring experience in management and dealing with festival traffic...if corporate does not force us to follow a failing strategy.
After working nearly a year at KK you may ask why I’m not proficient on more than one station. Excellent question. First, when I move over to another station the squeeze bottles are never labeled (until Stu Pickles was hired, now they’re sometimes labeled), so I always looked at the glut of unlabeled sauces and I’d go back to my station because the basic information is missing (also a health department violation for having numerous unlabeled, unchilled bottles). In his first week the new general manager Stu Pickles pulled out 90% of the containers under the grill station because they were lacking labels despite an expected health department visit. The second reason for my menu ignorance is the mountain of prep for my own and upcoming shifts I have piled up on my station throughout service. My attention to detail appears to be next level with my ability to anticipate stocking all items for all shifts including the weeknd. The third reason I wouldn’t learn multiple stations is a defense against the afternoon conference calls. In [month] the Bikini Bottom line was unprepared for a busy post lunch because one cook was cut and our expo person was busy with a conference call. The two of us remaining on the line had a miserable slog through an unexpectedly busy afternoon. When I brought this up to Krabs he disregarded me, being a good bean counter he quoted the cost percentage. What he didn’t take into account was the missing expo person who could have jumped on the line and expo to help the understaffed two man team. That person was stuck on a conference call. Just recently I saw the company actively lose money because of this poorly thought-out meeting during business hours. A customer wanted to order a dessert that was 86ed but had been restocked by our prep cook an hour before. The server was unable to sell them their dessert because the only person in the building who could help un-86 an item was on a conference call. This conference call calamity is another bone-headed choice that speaks to a larger decision-making problem within the corporate structure. Finish the conference calls by 10:45 am eastern.
In conclusion, I quit my position as a lowly grunt for this company because of its unwarranted perplexing dance steps and below average management. I don’t care how much varnish and lacquer is supplied, I refuse to polish this Bikini Bottom turd as a manager or full-time employee under the current circumstances. You would have to take a pickaxe to the floor, possibly relocate the bathrooms to add a door to the dishpit, get rid of the cheap low boy that doesn’t properly drain excess water, and Mr Gorbachov knock down that wall in the middle of the kitchen to give the proper amount of space to work. Or simply reduce the menu to 36 items (including sides) because that’s the amount of space this dreadful design can comfortably output. Would Gordon Ramsay compliment KK for all the unnecessary convoluted complications abound, or would Chef Ramsay yell about keeping it simple and demand KK chuck it in the flip? Thanks to the numerous pop up restaurants I have been a part of and the hectic world of trade shows/conventions, I may have more experience than anyone else employed by KK in smoothly opening a new location. I would enjoy being part of the opening team to ensure new locations have an efficiency Bikini Bottom lacks, and to keep upper management away from their worst instincts. Work with me and Chef Ren and we will help you become a well oiled machine like Chokey Chicken instead of the Chum Bucket cesspit Bikini Bottom currently embodies.